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ANNALS OF THE PARISH
CHAPTER XXV YEAR 1784
I have ever thought that this was a bright year； truly an Ann。 Dom。； for
in it many of the lads came home that had listed to be soldiers； and Mr
Howard； that was the midshipman； being now a captain of a man…of…war；
came down from England and married Effie Malcolm； and took her up
with him to London； where she wrote to her mother； that she found his
family people of great note； and more kind to her than she could write。
By this time； also； Major Macadam was made a colonel； and lived with his
lady in Edinburgh； where they were much respected by the genteeler
classes； Mrs Macadam being considered a great unco among them for all
manner of ladylike ornaments； she having been taught every sort of
perfection in that way by the old lady； who was educated at the court of
France； and was； from her birth； a person of quality。 In this year； also；
Captain Malcolm； her brother； married a daughter of a Glasgow merchant；
so that Mrs Malcolm； in her declining years； had the prospect of a bright
setting； but nothing could change the sober Christianity of her settled mind；
and although she was strongly invited； both by the Macadams and the
Howards； to see their felicity； she ever declined the same； saying〃No！ I
have been long out of the world； or rather； I have never been in it； my
ways are not as theirs； and although I ken their hearts would be glad to be
kind to me； I might fash their servants； or their friends might think me
unlike other folk； by which； instead of causing pleasure； mortification
might ensue； so I will remain in my own house； trusting that； when they
can spare the time； they will come and see me。〃
There was a spirit of true wisdom in this resolution； for it required a
forbearance that in weaker minds would have relaxed； but though a person
of a most slender and delicate frame of body； she was a Judith in fortitude；
and in all the fortune that seemed now smiling upon her； she never was
lifted up； but bore always that pale and meek look； which gave a
saintliness to her endeavours in the days of her suffering and poverty。
But when we enjoy most； we have least to tell。 I look back on this
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ANNALS OF THE PARISH
year as on a sunny spot in the valley； amidst the shadows of the clouds of
time； and I have nothing to record； save the remembrance of welcomings
and weddings； and a meeting of bairns and parents； that the wars and the
waters had long raged between。 Contentment within the bosom； lent a
livelier grace to the countenance of Nature； and everybody said； that in
this year the hedges were greener than common； the gowans brighter on
the brae； and the heads of the statelier trees adorned with a richer coronal
of leaves and blossoms。 All things were animated with the gladness of
thankfulness； and testified to the goodness of their Maker。
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ANNALS OF THE PARISH
CHAPTER XXVI YEAR 1785
Well may we say； in the pious words of my old friend and neighbour；
the Reverend Mr Keekie of Loupinton； that the world is such a wheel…
carriage； that it might very properly be called the WHIRL'D。 This
reflection was brought home to me in a very striking manner； while I was
preparing a discourse for my people； to be preached on the anniversary
day of my placing； in which I took a view of what had passed in the parish
during the five…and…twenty years that I had been； by the grace of God； the
pastor thereof。 The bairns； that were bairns when I came among my
people； were ripened unto parents； and a new generation was swelling in
the bud around me。 But it is what happened that I have to give an
account of。
This year the Lady Macadam's jointure…house that was； having been
long without a tenant； a Mr Cayenne and his family； American loyalists；
came and took it； and settled among us for a time。 His wife was a clever
woman； and they had two daughters； Miss Virginia and Miss Carolina； but
he was himself an ettercap； a perfect spunkie of passion； as ever was
known in town or country。 His wife had a terrible time o't with him； and
yet the unhappy man had a great share of common sense； and； saving the
exploits of his unmanageable temper； was an honest and creditable
gentleman。 Of his humour we soon had a sample； as I shall relate at
length all about it。
Shortly after he came to the parish； Mrs Balwhidder and me waited
upon the family to pay our respects； and Mr Cayenne； in a free and hearty
manner； insisted on us staying to dinner。 His wife； I could see； was not
satisfied with this； not being； as I discerned afterwards； prepared to give an
entertainment to strangers； however； we fell into the misfortune of staying；
and nothing could exceed the happiness of Mr Cayenne。 I thought him
one of the blithest bodies I had ever seen； and had no notion that he was
such a tap of tow as in the sequel he proved himself。
As there was something extra to prepare； the dinner was a little longer
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ANNALS OF THE PARISH
of being on the table than usual； at which he began to fash； and every now
and then took a turn up and down the room； with his hands behind his
back； giving a short melancholious whistle。 At length the dinner was
served； but it was more scanty than he had expected； and this upset his
good…humour altogether。 Scarcely had I asked the blessing when he
began to storm at his blackamoor servant； who was； however； used to his
way； and did his work without minding him； but by some neglect there
was no mustard down； which Mr Cayenne called for in the voice of a
tempest； and one of the servant lassies came in with the pot； trembling。 It
happened that； as it had not been used for a day or two before； the lid was
clagged； and； as it were； glued in； so that Mr Cayenne could not get it out；
which put him quite wud； and he attempted to fling it at Sambo； the black
lad's head； but it stottit against the wall； and the lid flying open； the whole
mustard flew in his own face； which made him a sight not to be spoken of。
However it calmed him； but really； as I had never seen such a man before；
I could not but consider the accident as a providential reproof； and
trembled to think what greater evil might fall out in the hands of a man so
left to himself in the intemperance of passion。
But the worst thing about Mr Cayenne was his meddling with matters
in which he had no concern； for he had a most irksome nature； and could
not be at rest； so that he was truly a thorn in our side。 Among other of his
strange doings； was the part he took in the proceedings of the session； with
which he had as little to do； in a manner； as the man in the moon； but
having no business on his hands； he attended every sederunt； and from less
to more； having no self… government； he began to give his opinion in our
deliberations； and often bred us trouble； by causing strife to arise。
It happened； as the time of the summer occasion was drawing near；
that it behoved us to make arrangements about the assistance； and upon
the suggestion of the elders； to which I paid always the greatest deference；
I invited Mr Keekie of Loupinton； who was a sound preacher； and a great
expounder of the kittle parts of the Old Testament； being a man well
versed in the Hebrew and etymologies； for which he was much reverenced
by the old people that delighted to search the Scriptures。 I had also
written to Mr Sprose of Annock； a preacher of another sort； being a