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If we stood this。
If we stand this
If we stand this
We can't stand this。
DAPH； SPAR； NICE。 Great Jove； this interference。
Is more than we can stand；
Of them make a clearance；
With your majestic hand。
JOVE。 This cool audacity； it beats us hollow。
I'm Jupiter。
MARS。 I'm Mars。
AP。 I'm Apollo。
＇Enter Diana and all the other gods and goddesses。
ALL。 ＇kneeling with their foreheads on the ground＇
Jupiter； Mars； and Apollo
Have quitted the dwellings of men；
The other gods quickly will follow。
And what will become of us then。
Oh pardon us； Jove and Apollo；
Pardon us； Jupiter； Mars：
Oh see us in misery wallow。
Cursing our terrible stars。
＇enter other gods。＇
ALL THESPIANS： Let us remain； we beg of you pleadingly。
THREE GODS： Let them remain； they beg of us pleadingly。
THES。 Life on Olympus suits us exceedingly。
GODS。 Life on Olympus suits them exceedingly。
THES。 Let us remain； we pray in humility。
GODS。 Let 'em remain； they pray in humility。
THES。 If we have shown some little ability。
GODS。 If they have shown some little ability。
Let us remain； etc。。。
JUP。 Enough； your reign is ended。
Upon this sacred hill。
Let him be apprehended
And learn out awful will。
Away to earth； contemptible comedians；
And hear our curse； before we set you free'
You shall be all be eminent tragedians；
Whom no one ever goes to see。
ALL。 We go to earth； contemptible tragedians；
We hear his curse； before he sets us free；
We shall all be eminent tragedians；
Whom no one ever； ever goes to see。
SILL； SPAR； THES。 Whom no one
Ever goes to see。
＇The thespians are driven away by the gods； who group themselves
in attitudes of triumph。＇
THES。 Now； here you see the arrant folly
Of doing your best to make things jolly。
I've ruled the world like a chap in his senses；
Observe the terrible consequences。
Great Jupiter； whom nothing pleases；
Splutters and swears； and kicks up breezes；
And sends us home in a mood avengin'
In double quick time； like a railroad engine。
And this he does without compunction；
Because I have discharged with unction
A highly complicated function
Complying with his own injunction；
Fol； lol； lay
CHO。 All this he does。。。。etc。
＇The gods drive the thespians away。 The thespians prepare to
descent the mountain as the curtain falls。
CURTAIN
TRIAL BY JURY
Libretto by W。 S。 Gilbert
Music by Sir Arthur Sullivan
DRAMATIS PERSONAE
THE LEARNED JUDGE
THE PLAINTIFF
THE DEFENDANT
COUNSEL FOR THE PLAINTIFF
USHER
FOREMAN OF THE JURY
ASSOCIATE
FIRST BRIDESMAID
First produced at the Royalty Theatre； London； March 25； 1875
SCENE … A Court of Justice； Barristers； Attorney； and Jurymen
discovered。
CHORUS
Hark； the hour of ten is sounding：
Hearts with anxious fears are bounding；
Hall of Justice； crowds surrounding；
Breathing hope and fear
For to…day in this arena；
Summoned by a stern subpoena；
Edwin； sued by Angelina；
Shortly will appear。
Enter Usher
SOLO … USHER
Now； Jurymen； hear my advice
All kinds of vulgar prejudice
I pray you set aside：
With stern； judicial frame of mind
From bias free of every kind；
This trial must be tried。
CHORUS
From bias free of every kind；
This trial must be tried。
＇During Chorus； Usher sings fortissimo； 〃Silence in Court！〃＇
USHER Oh； listen to the plaintiff's case：
Observe the features of her face
The broken…hearted bride。
Condole with her distress of mind：
From bias free of every kind；
This trial must be tried！
CHORUS From bias free； etc。
USHER And when； amid the plaintiff's shrieks；
The ruffianly defendant speaks
Upon the other side；
What he may say you needn't mind…
From bias free of every kind；
This trial must be tried！
CHORUS From bias free； etc。
Enter Defendant
RECIT DEFENDANT
Is this the court of the Exchequer？
ALL。 It is！
DEFENDANT （aside） Be firm； be firm； my pecker；
Your evil star's in the ascendant！
ALL。 Who are you？
DEFENDANT。 I'm the Defendant。
CHORUS OF JURYMEN （shaking their fists）
Monster； dread our damages。
We're the jury！
Dread our fury！
DEFENDANT Hear me； hear me； if you please；
These are very strange proceedings
For permit me to remark
On the merits of my pleadings；
You're at present in the dark。
＇Defendant beckons to Jurymenthey leave the box and gather around
him as they sing the following：
That's a very true remark
On the merits of his pleadings
We're at present in the dark！
Ha！ ha！ha！ ha！
SONG DEFENDANT
When first my old； old love I knew；
My bosom welled with joy；
My riches at her feet I threw
I was a love…sick boy！
No terms seemed too extravagant
Upon her to employ
I used to mope； and sigh； and pant；
Just like a love…sick boy！
Tink…a…tank！ Tink…a…tank！
But joy incessant palls the sense；
And love； unchanged； will cloy；
And she became a bore intense
Unto her love…sick boy！
With fitful glimmer burnt my flame；
And I grew cold and coy；
At last； one morning； I became
Another's love…sick boy。
Tink…a…tank！ Tink…a…tank！
CHORUS OF JURYMEN （advancing stealthily）
Oh； I was like that when a lad！
A shocking young scamp of a rover；
I behaved like a regular cad；
But that sort of thing is all over。
I'm now a respectable chap
And shine with a virtue resplendent
And； therefore； I haven't a scrap
Of sympathy with the defendant！
He shall treat us with awe；
If there isn't a flaw；
Singing so merrilyTrial…la…law！
Trial…la…law！ Trial…la…law！
Singing so merrilyTrial…la…law！
＇They enter the Jury…box。
RECITUSHER （on Bench）
Silence in Court； and all attention lend。
Behold your Judge！ In due submission bend！
Enter Judge on Bench
CHORUS
All hail； great Judge！
To your bright rays
We never grudge
Ecstatic praise。
All hail！
May each decree
As statute rank
And never be
Reversed in banc。
All hail！
RECITJUDGE
For these kind words； accept my thanks； I pray。
A Breach of Promise we've to try to…day。
But firstly； if the time you'll not begrudge；
I'll tell you how I came to be a Judge。
ALL。 He'll tell us how he came to be a Judge！
JUDGE。 I'll tell you how。。。
ALL。 He'll tell us how。。。
JUDGE。 I'll tell you how。。。
ALL。 He'll tell us how。。。
JUDGE Let me speak。。。！
ALL。 Let him speak！
JUDGE。 Let me speak！
ALL。 （in a whisper）。 Let him speak！
He'll tell us how he came to be a Judge！
USHER。 Silence in Court！ Silence in Court！
SONGJUDGE
When I； good friends； was called to the bar；
I'd an appetite fresh and hearty。
But I was； as many young barristers are；
An impecunious party。
I'd a swallow…tail coat of a beautiful blue
And a brief which I bought of a booby
A coup