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Whose heart is much too hard
Is always Gideon Crawleha！ ha！
BOTH。 How dreadful when an innocent heart
Becomes； perforce； a bad young Bart。；
And still more hard on old Adam；
His former faithful valley…de…sham！
ROB。 This is a painful state of things； old Adam！
ADAM。 Painful； indeed！ Ah； my poor master； when I swore
that； come what would； I would serve you in all things for ever；
I little thought to what a pass it would bring me！ The
confidential adviser to the greatest villain unhung！ Now； sir；
to business。 What crime do you propose to commit to…day？
ROB。 How should I know？ As my confidential adviser； it's
your duty to suggest something。
ADAM。 Sir； I loathe the life you are leading； but a good
old man's oath is paramount； and I obey。 Richard Dauntless is
here with pretty Rose Maybud； to ask your consent to their
marriage。 Poison their beer。
ROB。 Nonot thatI know I'm a bad Bart。； but I'm not as
bad a Bart。 as all that。
ADAM。 Well； there you are； you see！ It's no use my making
suggestions if you don't adopt them。
ROB。 （melodramatically）。 How would it be； do you think；
were I to lure him here with cunning wilebind him with good
stout rope to yonder postand then； by making hideous faces at
him； curdle the heart…blood in his arteries； and freeze the very
marrow in his bones？ How say you； Adam； is not the scheme well
planned？
ADAM。 It would be simply rudenothing more。 But
softthey come！
（Adam and Robin retire up as Richard and Rose enter； preceded by
Chorus of Bridesmaids。）
DUETRICHARD and ROSE。
RICH。 Happily coupled are we；
You see
I am a jolly Jack Tar；
My star；
And you are the fairest；
The richest and rarest
Of innocent lasses you are；
By far
Of innocent lasses you are！
Fanned by a favouring gale；
You'll sail
Over life's treacherous sea
With me；
And as for bad weather；
We'll brave it together；
And you shall creep under my lee；
My wee！
And you shall creep under my lee！
For you are such a smart little craft
Such a neat little； sweet little craft；
Such a bright little； tight little；
Slight little； light little；
Trim little； prim little craft！
CHORUS。 For she is such； etc。
ROSE。 My hopes will be blighted； I fear；
My dear；
In a month you'll be going to sea；
Quite free；
And all of my wishes
You'll throw to the fishes
As though they were never to be；
Poor me！
As though they were never to be。
And I shall be left all alone
To moan；
And weep at your cruel deceit；
Complete；
While you'll be asserting
Your freedom by flirting
With every woman you meet；
You cheatAh！
With every woman you meet！ Ah！
Though I am such a smart little craft
Such a neat little； sweet little craft；
Such a bright little； tight little；
Slight little； light little；
Trim little； prim little craft！
CHORUS。 Though she is such； etc。
（Enter Robin。）
ROB。 Soho！ pretty onein my power at last； eh？ Know ye
not that I have those within my call who； at my lightest bidding；
would immure ye in an uncomfortable dungeon？ （Calling。） What
ho！ within there！
RICH。 Holdwe are prepared for this （producing a Union
Jack）。 Here is a flag that none dare defy （all kneel）； and while
this glorious rag floats over Rose Maybud's head； the man does
not live who would dare to lay unlicensed hand upon her！
ROB。 Foiledand by a Union Jack！ But a time will come；
and then…
ROSE。 Nay； let me plead with him。 （To Robin。） Sir Ruthven；
have pity。 In my book of etiquette the case of a maiden about to
be wedded to one who unexpectedly turns out to be a baronet with
a curse on him is not considered。 Time was when you loved me
madly。 Prove that this was no selfish love by according your
consent to my marriage with one who； if he be not you yourself；
is the next best thingyour dearest friend！
BALLADROSE。
In bygone days I had thy love
Thou hadst my heart。
But Fate； all human vows above；
Our lives did part！
By the old love thou hadst for me
By the fond heart that beat for thee
By joys that never now can be；
Grant thou my prayer！
ALL （kneeling）。 Grant thou her prayer！
ROB。 （recitative）。 Take herI yield！
ALL。 （recitative）。 Oh； rapture！ （All rising。）
CHORUS。 Away to the parson we go
Say we're solicitous very
That he will turn two into one
Singing hey； derry down derry！
RICH。 For she is such a smart little craft…
ROSE。 Such a neat little； sweet little craft
RICH。 Such a bright little…
ROSE。 Tight little…
RICH。 Slight little…
ROSE。 Light little…
BOTH。 Trim little； prim little craft！
CHORUS。 For she is such a smart little craft； etc。
（Exeunt all but Robin。）
ROB。 For a week I have fulfilled my accursed doom！ I have
duly committed a crime a day！ Not a great crime； I trust； but
still； in the eyes of one as strictly regulated as I used to be；
a crime。 But will my ghostly ancestors be satisfied with what I
have done； or will they regard it as an unworthy subterfuge？
（Addressing Pictures。） Oh； my forefathers； wallowers in blood；
there came at last a day when； sick of crime； you； each and
every； vowed to sin no more； and so； in agony； called welcome
Death to free you from your cloying guiltiness。 Let the sweet
psalm of that repentant hour soften your long…dead hearts； and
tune your souls to mercy on your poor posterity！ （Kneeling）。
（The stage darkens for a moment。 It becomes light again； and the
Pictures are seen to have become animated。）
CHORUS OF FAMILY PORTRAITS。
Painted emblems of a race；
All accurst in days of yore；
Each from his accustomed place
Steps into the world once more。
（The Pictures step from their frames and march round the stage。）
Baronet of Ruddigore；
Last of our accursed line；
Down upon the oaken floor
Down upon those knees of thine。
Coward； poltroon； shaker； squeamer；
Blockhead； sluggard； dullard； dreamer；
Shirker； shuffler； crawler； creeper；
Sniffler； snuffler； wailer； weeper；
Earthworm； maggot； tadpole； weevil！
Set upon thy course of evil；
Lest the King of Spectre…land
Set on thee his grisly hand！
（The Spectre of Sir Roderic descends from his frame。）
SIR ROD。 Beware！ beware！ beware！
ROB。 Gaunt vision； who art thou
That thus； with icy glare
And stern relentless brow；
Appearest； who knows how？
SIR ROD。 I am the spectre of the late
Sir Roderic Murgatroyd；
Who comes to warn thee that thy fate
Thou canst not now avoid。
ROB。 Alas； poor ghost！
SIR ROD。 The pity you
Express for nothing goes：
We spectres are a jollier crew
Than you； perhaps； suppose！
CHORUS。 We spectres are a jollier crew
Than you； perhaps； suppose！
SONGSIR RODERIC。
When the night wind howls in the chimney cowls； and the bat in
the moonlight flies；
And inky clouds； like funeral shrouds； sail