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turn now。〃 No； they let us have all the fun to ourselves； and
never seem to grudge it。
MAR。 It makes one feel quite selfish。 It almost seems like
taking advantage of their good nature。
GIU。 How nice they were about the double rations。
MAR。 Most considerate。 Ah！ there's only one thing wanting
to make us thoroughly comfortable。
GIU。 And that is？
MAR。 The dear little wives we left behind us three months
ago。
GIU。 Yes； it is dull without female society。 We can do
without everything else； but we can't do without that。
MAR。 And if we have that in perfection； we have everything。
There is only one recipe for perfect happiness。
SONGMARCO。
Take a pair of sparkling eyes；
Hidden； ever and anon；
In a merciful eclipse
Do not heed their mild surprise
Having passed the Rubicon；
Take a pair of rosy lips；
Take a figure trimly planned
Such as admiration whets
（Be particular in this）；
Take a tender little hand；
Fringed with dainty fingerettes；
Press itin parenthesis；
Ah！ Take all these； you lucky man
Take and keep them； if you can！
Take a pretty little cot
Quite a miniature affair
Hung about with trellised vine；
Furnish it upon the spot
With the treasures rich and rare
I've endeavoured to define。
Live to love and love to live
You will ripen at your ease；
Growing on the sunny side
Fate has nothing more to give。
You're a dainty man to please
If you are not satisfied。
Ah！ Take my counsel； happy man；
Act upon it； if you can！
（Enter Chorus of Contadine； running in； led by Fiametta and
Vittoria。 They are met by all the Ex…Gondoliers； who welcome
them heartily。）
SCENECHORUS OF GIRLS； QUARTET； DUET and CHORUS。
Here we are； at the risk of our lives；
From ever so far； and we've brought your wives
And to that end we've crossed the main；
And don't intend to return again！
FIA。 Though obedience is strong；
Curiosity's stronger
We waited for long；
Till we couldn't wait longer。
VIT。 It's imprudent； we know；
But without your society
Existence was slow；
And we wanted variety
BOTH。 Existence was slow； and we wanted variety。
ALL。 So here we are； at the risk of our lives；
From ever so far； and we've brought your wives
And to that end we've crossed the main；
And don't intend to return again！
（Enter Gianetta and Tessa。 They rush to the arms of Marco and
Giuseppe。）
GIU。 Tessa！
TESS。 Giuseppe！ ｛All embrace。｝
GIA。 Marco！
MAR。 Gianetta！
TESSA and GIANETTA。
TESS。 After sailing to this island
GIA。 Tossing in a manner frightful；
TESS。 We are all once more on dry land
GIA。 And we find the change delightful；
TESS。 As at home we've been remaining
We've not seen you both for ages；
GIA。 Tell me； are you fond of reigning？
How's the food； and what's the wages？
TESS。 Does your new employment please ye？
GIA。 How does Royalizing strike you？
TESS。 Is it difficult or easy？
GIA。 Do you think your subjects like you？
TESS。 I am anxious to elicit；
Is it plain and easy steering？
GIA。 Take it altogether； is it
Better fun than gondoliering？
BOTH。 We shall both go on requesting
Till you tell us； never doubt it；
Everything is interesting；
Tell us； tell us all about it！
CHORUS。 They will both go on requesting； etc。
TESS。 Is the populace exacting？
GIA。 Do they keep you at a distance？
TESS。 All unaided are you acting；
GIA。 Or do they provide assistance？
TESS。 When you're busy； have you got to
Get up early in the morning？
GIA。 If you do what you ought not to；
Do they give the usual warning？
TESS。 With a horse do they equip you？
GIA。 Lots of trumpeting and drumming？
TESS。 Do the Royal tradesmen tip you？
GIA。 Ain't the livery becoming！
TESS。 Does your human being inner
Feed on everything that nice is？
GIA。 Do they give you wine for dinner；
Peaches； sugar…plums； and ices？
BOTH。 We shall both go on requesting
Till you tell us； never doubt it；
Everything is interesting；
Tell us； tell us all about it！
CHORUS。 They will both go on requesting； etc。
MAR。 This is indeed a most delightful surprise！
TESS。 Yes； we thought you'd like it。 You see； it was like
this。 After you left we felt very dull and mopey； and the days
crawled by； and you never wrote； so at last I said to Gianetta；
〃I can't stand this any longer； those two poor Monarchs haven't
got any one to mend their stockings or sew on their buttons or
patch their clothesat least； I hope they haven'tlet us all
pack up a change and go and see how they're getting on。〃 And she
said； 〃Done；〃 and they all said； 〃Done〃； and we asked old Giacopo
to lend us his boat； and he said； 〃Done〃； and we've crossed the
sea； and； thank goodness； that's done； and here we are；
andandI've done！
GIA。 And nowwhich of you is King？
TESS。 And which of us is Queen？
GIU。 That we shan't know until Nurse turns up。 But never
mind thatthe question is； how shall we celebrate the
commencement of our honeymoon？ Gentlemen； will you allow us to
offer you a magnificent banquet？
ALL。 We will！
GIU。 Thanks very much； and； ladies； what do you say to a
dance？
TESS。 A banquet and a dance！ O； it's too much happiness！
CHORUS and DANCE。
Dance a cachucha； fandango； bolero；
Xeres we'll drinkManzanilla； Montero
Wine； when it runs in abundance； enhances
The reckless delight of that wildest of dances！
To the pretty pitter…pitter…patter；
And the clitter…clitter…clitter…clatter
Clitterclitterclatter；
Pitterpitterpatter；
Patter； patter； patter； patter； we'll dance。
Old Xeres we'll drinkManzanilla； Montero；
For wine； when it runs in abundance； enhances
The reckless delight of that wildest of dances！
（Cachucha。）
（The dance is interrupted by the unexpected appearance of Don
Alhambra； who looks on with astonishment。 Marco and Giuseppe
appear embarrassed。 The others run off； except Drummer Boy； who
is driven off by Don Alhambra。）
DON AL。 Good evening。 Fancy ball？
GIU。 No； not exactly。 A little friendly dance。 That's
all。 Sorry you're late。
DON AL。 But I saw a groom dancing； and a footman！
MAR。 Yes。 That's the Lord High Footman。
DON AL。 And； dear me； a common little drummer boy！
GIU。 Oh no！ That's the Lord High Drummer Boy。
DON AL。 But surely； surely the servants'…hall is the place
for these gentry？
GIU。 Oh dear no！ We have appropriated the servants'…hall。
It's the Royal Apartment； and accessible only by tickets
obtainable at the Lord Chamberlain's office。
MAR。 We really must have some place that we can call our
own。
DON AL。 （puzzled）。 I'm afraid I'm not quite equal to the
intellectual pressure of the conversation。
GIU。 You see； the Monarchy has been re…modelled on
Republican principles。
DON AL。 What！
GIU。 All departments rank equally； and everybody is at the
head of his department。
DON AL。 I see。
MAR。 I'm afraid you're annoyed。
DON AL。 No。 I won't say that。 It's not quite what I
expected。
GIU。 I'm awfully sorry。
MAR。 So am I。
GIU。 By the by； can I offer you anything after your voyage？
A plate of macaroni and a rusk？
DON AL。 （preoccupied）。 No； nonothingnothing。
GIU。 Obliged to be careful？
DON AL。