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her husband's heart； but kept in check by an awestruck reverence
for his exalted intellectual qualities and his majestic personal
appearance。
JULIA。 Oh； that is your idea of a good part？
LUD。 Yesa wife who regards her husband's slightest wish
as an inflexible law； and who ventures but rarely into his august
presence； unless （which would happen seldom） he should summon her
to appear before him。 A crushed； despairing violet； whose
blighted existence would culminate （all too soon） in a lonely and
pathetic death…scene！ A fine part； my dear。
JULIA。 Yes。 There's a good deal to be said for your view
of it。 Now there are some actresses whom it would fit like a
glove。
LUD。 （aside）。 I wish I'd married one of 'em！
JULIA。 But； you see； I must consider my temperament。 For
instance； my temperament would demand some strong scenes of
justifiable jealousy。
LUD。 Oh； there's no difficulty about that。 You shall have
them。
JULIA。 With a lovely but detested rival
LUD。 Oh； I'll provide the rival。
JULIA。 Whom I should stabstabstab！
LUD。 Oh； I wouldn't stab her。 It's been done to death。 I
should treat her with a silent and contemptuous disdain； and
delicately withdraw from a position which； to one of your
sensitive nature； would be absolutely untenable。 Dear me； I can
see you delicately withdrawing； up centre and off！
JULIA。 Can you？
LUD。 Yes。 It's a fine situationand in your hands； full
of quiet pathos！
DUETLUDWIG and JULIA。
LUD。 Now Julia； come；
Consider it from
This dainty point of view
A timid tender
Feminine gender；
Prompt to coyly coo
Yet silence seeking；
Seldom speaking
Till she's spoken to
A comfy； cosy；
Rosy…posy
Innocent ingenoo！
The part you're suited to
（To give the deuce her due）
A sweet （O； jiminy！）
Miminy…piminy；
Innocent ingenoo！
ENSEMBLE。
LUD。 JULIA。
The part you're suited to I'm much obliged to you；
（To give the deuce her due） I don't think that would do
A sweet （O； jiminy！） To play （O； jiminy！）
Miminy…piminy； Miminy…piminy；
Innocent ingenoo！ Innocent ingenoo！
JULIA。 You forget my special magic
（In a high dramatic sense）
Lies in situations tragic
Undeniably intense。
As I've justified promotion
In the histrionic art；
I'll submit to you my notion
Of a first…rate part。
LUD。 Well； let us see your notion
Of a first…rate part。
JULIA （dramatically）。
I have a rival！ Frenzy…thrilled；
I find you both together！
My heart stands stillwith horror chilled…
Hard as the millstone nether！
Then softly； slyly； snaily； snaky
Crawly； creepy； quaily； quaky
I track her on her homeward way；
As panther tracks her fated prey！
（Furiously。） I fly at her soft white throat
The lily…white laughing leman！
On her agonized gaze I gloat
With the glee of a dancing demon！
My rival sheI have no doubt of her…
So I hold ontill the breath is out of her！
till the breath is out of her！
And thenRemorse！ Remorse！
O cold unpleasant corse；
Avaunt！ Avaunt！
That lifeless form
I gaze upon
That face； still warm
But weirdly wan
Those eyes of glass
I contemplate
And then； alas！
Too latetoo late！
I find she isyour Aunt！
（Shuddering。） Remorse！ Remorse！
Then； madmadmad！
With fancies wildchimerical
Now sorrowfulsilentsad
Now hullaballoo hysterical！
Ha！ ha！ ha！ ha！
But whether I'm sad or whether I'm glad；
Mad！ mad！ mad！ mad！
This calls for the resources of a high…class art；
And satisfies my notion of a first…rate part！
＇Exit JULIA
Enter all the Chorus； hurriedly； and in great excitement。
CHORUS。
Your Highness； there's a party at the door
Your Highness； at the door there is a party
She says that we expect her；
But we do not recollect her；
For we never saw her countenance before！
With rage and indignation she is rife；
Because our welcome wasn't very hearty
She's as sulky as a super；
And she's swearing like a trooper；
O； you never heard such language in your life！
Enter BARONESS VON KRAKENFELDT； in a fury。
BAR。 With fury indescribable I burn！
With rage I'm nearly ready to explode！
There'll be grief and tribulation when I learn
To whom this slight unbearable is owed！
For whatever may be due I'll pay it double
There'll be terror indescribable and trouble！
With a hurly…burly and a hubble…bubble
I'll pay you for this pretty episode！
ALL。 Oh； whatever may be due she'll pay it double！
It's very good of her to take the trouble
But we don't know what she means by 〃hubble…bubble〃
No doubt it's an expression la mode。
BAR。 （to LUDWIG）。
Do you know who I am？
LUD。 （examining her）。 I don't；
Your countenance I can't fix； my dear。
BAR。 This proves I'm not a sham。
（Showing pocket…handkerchief。）
LUD。 （examining it）。 It won't；
It only says 〃Krakenfeldt； Six；〃 my dear。
BAR。 Express your grief profound！
LUD。 I shan't！
This tone I never allow； my love。
BAR。 Rudolph at once produce！
LUD。 I can't；
He isn't at home just now； my love。
BAR。 （astonished）。 He isn't at home just now！
ALL。 He isn't at home just now；
（Dancing derisively。） He has an appointment particular；
very…
You'll find him； I think； in the town cemetery；
And that's how we come to be making so merry；
For he isn't at home just now！
BAR。 But bless my heart and soul alive； it's impudence
personified！
I've come here to be matrimonially matrimonified！
LUD。 For any disappointment I am sorry unaffectedly；
But yesterday that nobleman expired quite unexpectedly
ALL （sobbing）。 Tol the riddle lol！
Tol the riddle lol！
Tol the riddle； lol the riddle； lol lol lay！
（Then laughing wildly。） Tol the riddle； lol the riddle； lol
lol
lay！
BAR。 But this is most unexpected。 He was well enough at a
quarter to twelve yesterday。
LUD。 Yes。 He died at half…past eleven。
BAR。 Bless me； how very sudden！
LUD。 It was sudden。
BAR。 But what in the world am I to do？ I was to have been
married to him to…day！
ALL （singing and dancing）。
For any disappointment we are sorry unaffectedly；
But yesterday that nobleman expired quite unexpectedly
Tol the riddle lol！
BAR。 Is this Court Mourning or a Fancy Ball？
LUD。 Well； it's a delicate combination of both effects。
It
is intended to express inconsolable grief for the decease of the
late Duke and ebullient joy at the accession of his successor。 I
am his successor。 Permit me to present you to my Grand Duchess。
（Indicating JULIA。）
BAR。 Your Grand Duchess？ Oh； your Highness！ （Curtseying
profoundly。）
JULIA （sneering at her）。 Old frump！
BAR。 Humph！ A recent creation； probably？
LUD。 We were married only half an hour ago。
BAR。 Exactly 。 I thought she seemed new to the position。
JULIA。 Ma'am； I don't know who you are； but I flatter
myself I can do justice to any part on the very shortest notice。
BAR。 My dear； under the circumstances you are doing
admirablyand you'll improve with practice。 It's so difficult
to be a lady when one isn't born to it。
JULIA （in a rage； to LUDWIG）。 Am I to stand this？ Am I
not
to be allowed