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making way with himself suggests how dead already is that individuality
which we deem to be of the very essence of the thing。
Marriage is thus a species of investment contracted by the existing
family for the sake of the prospective one； the actual participants being
only lay figures in the affair。 Sometimes the father decides the matter
himself； sometimes he or the relative who stands in loco parentis calls for
a plebiscit on the subject； for such an extension of the suffrage has
gradually crept even into patriarchal institutions。 The family then
assemble； sit in solemn conclave on the question； and decide it by vote。
Of course the interested parties are not asked their opinion； as it might be
prejudiced。 The result of the conference must be highly gratifying。 To
have one's wife chosen for one by vote of one's relatives cannot but be
satisfactoryto the electors。 The outcome of this ballot； like that of
universal suffrage elsewhere； is at the best unobjectionable mediocrity。
Somehow such a result does not seem quite to fulfil one's ideal of a wife。
It is true that the upper classes of impersonal France practise this method
of marital selection； their conseils de famille furnishing in some sort a
parallel。 But； as is well known； matrimony among these same upper
classes is largely form devoid of substance。 It begins impressively with a
dual ceremony； the civil contract； which amounts to a contract of civility
between the parties； and a religious rite to render the same perpetual； and
there it is too apt to end。
So much for the immediate influence on the man； the eventual effect
on the race remains to be considered。 Now； if the first result be anything；
the second must in the end be everything。 For however trifling it be in
the individual instance； it goes on accumulating with each successive
generation； like compound interest。 The choosing of a wife by family
suffrage is not simply an exponent of the impersonal state of things； it is a
power toward bringing such a state of things about。 A hermit seldom
develops to his full possibilities； and the domestic variety is no exception
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to the rule。 A man who is linked to some one that toward him remains a
cipher lacks surroundings inciting to psychological growth； nor is he more
favorably circumstanced because all his ancestors have been similarly
circumscribed。
As if to make assurance doubly sure； natural selection here steps in to
further the process。 To prove this with all the rigidity of demonstration
desirable is in the present state of erotics beyond our power。 Until our
family trees give us something more than mere skeletons of dead branches；
we must perforce continue ignorant of the science of grafts。 For the
nonce we must be content to generalize from our own premises； only
rising above them sufficiently to get a bird's…eye view of our neighbor's
estates。 Such a survey has at least one advantage： the whole field of view
appears perfectly plain。
Surveying the subject； then； from this ego…altruistic position； we can
perceive why matrimony； as we practise it； should result in increasing the
personality of our race： for the reason namely that psychical similarity
determines the selection。 At first sight； indeed； such a natural affinity
would seem to have little or nothing to do with marriage。 As far as
outsiders are capable of judging； unlikes appear to fancy one another quite
as gratuitously as do likes。 Connubial couples are often anything but
twin souls。 Yet our own dual use of the word 〃like〃 bears historic
witness to the contrary。 For in this expression we have a record from
early Gothic times that men liked others for being like themselves。 Since
then； our feelings have not changed materially； although our mode of
showing them is slightly less intense。 In those simple days stranger and
enemy were synonymous terms； and their objects were received in a
corresponding spirit。 In our present refined civilization we hurl epithets
instead of spears； and content ourselves with branding as heterodox the
opinions of another which do not happen to coincide with our own。 The
instinct of self…development naturally begets this self…sided view。 We
insensibly find those persons congenial whose ideas resemble ours； and
gravitate to them； as leaves on a pond do to one another； nearer and nearer
till they touch。 Is it likely； then； that in the most important case of all the
rule should suddenly cease to hold？ Is it to be presumed that even
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The Soul of the Far East
Socrates chose Xantippe for her remarkable contrariety to himself？
Mere physical attraction is another matter。 Corporeally considered；
men not infrequently fall in love with their opposites； the phenomenally
tall with the painfully short； the unnecessarily stout with the distressingly
slender。 But even such inartistic juxtapositions are much less common
than we are apt at times to think。 For it must never be forgotten that the
exceptional character of the phenomena renders them conspicuous； the
customary more consorted combinations failing to excite attention。
Besides； there exists a reason for physical incongruity which does not
hold psychically。 Nature sanctions the one while she discountenances the
other。 Instead of the forethought she once bestowed upon the body； it
receives at her hands now but the scantiest attention。 Its development
has ceased to be an object with her。 For some time past almost all her
care has been devoted to the evolution of the soul。 The consequence is
that physically man is much less specialized than many other animals。 In
other words； he is bodily less advanced in the race for competitive
extermination。 He belongs to an antiquated； inefficient type of mammal。
His organism is still of the jack…of…all…trades pattern； such as prevailed
generally in the more youthful stages of organic lifeone not specially
suited to any particular pursuit。 Were it not for his cerebral convolutions
he could not compete for an instant in the struggle for existence； and even
the monkey would reign in his stead。 But brain is more effective than
biceps； and a being who can kill his opponent farther off than he can see
him evidently needs no great excellence of body to survive his foe。
The field of competition has thus been transferred from matter to mind；
but the fight has lost none of its keenness in consequence。 With the same
zeal with which advantageous anatomical variations were seized upon and
perpetuated； psychical ones are now grasped and rendered hereditary。
Now if opposites were to fancy and wed one another； such fortunate
improvements would soon be lost。 They would be scattered over the
community at large even it they escaped entire neutralization。 To prevent
so disastrous a result nature implants a desire for resemblance； which
desire man instinctively acts upon。
Complete compatibility of temperament is of course a thing not to be
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The Soul of the Far East
expected nor indeed to be desired； since it would defeat its own end by
allowing no room for variation。 A fairly broad basis of agreement；
however； exists even when least suspected。 This common ground of
content consists of those qualities