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the story of my heart-第14章

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confined to two or three。 We have conceived the idea of creation; which is
the highest and grandest of all; if not historically true; we have conceived
the idea of design; that is of an intelligence making order and revolution
of chaos; and we have conceived the idea of evolution by physical laws of
matter; which; though now so much insisted on; is as ancient as the Greek
philosophers。  But there may be another alternative; I think there are other
alternatives。

Whenever the mind obtains a wider view we may find that origin。
for instance; is not always due to what is understood by cause。
At this moment the mind is unable to conceive of anything happening; or of
anything coming into existence; without a cause。 From cause to effect is the
sequence of our ideas。  But I think that if at some time we should obtain an
altogether different and broader sequence of ideas; we may discover that
there are various other alternatives。 As the world; and the universe at
large; was not constructed according to plan; so it is clear that the
sequence or circle of ideas which includes
plan; and cause; and effect; are not in the circle of ideas
which would correctly explain it。 Put aside the plan…circle of
ideas; and it will at once be evident that there is no inherent
necessity or 〃must。〃 There is no inherent necessity for a first
cause; or that the world and the universe was created; or that
it was shaped of existing matter; or that it evolved itself and
its inhabitants; or that the cosmos has existed in varying forms
for ever。 There may be other alternatives altogether。 The only
idea I can give is the idea that there is another idea。

In this 〃must〃〃it must follow〃lies my objection to the logic of science。
The arguments proceed from premises to conclusions; and end with the
assumption 〃it therefore follows。〃 But I say that; however carefully the
argument be built up; even though apparently flawless; there is no such
thing at present as 〃it must follow。〃 Human ideas at present naturally form
a plan; and a balanced design; they might be indicated by a geometrical
figure; an upright straight line in the centre; and branching from that
straight line curves on either hand exactly equal to each other。 In drawing
that is how we are taught; to balance the outline or curves on one side with
the curves on the other。 In nature and in fact there is no such thing。 The
stem of a tree represents the upright line; but the branches do not balance;
those on one side are larger or longer than those on the other。 Nothing is
straight; but all things curved; crooked; and unequal。

The human body is the most remarkable instance of inequality;
lack of balance; and want of plan。 The exterior is beautiful in
its lines; but the two hands; the two feet; the two sides of the
face; the two sides of the profile; are not precisely equal。
The very nails of the fingers are set ajar; as it were; to
the lines of the hand; and not quite straight。 Examination of the interior
organs shows a total absence of balance。 The heart is not in the centre; nor
do the organs correspond in any way。 The viscera are wholly opposed to plan。
Coming; lastly; to the bones; these have no humanity; as it were; of shape;
they
are neither round nor square; the first sight of them causes a sense of
horror; so extra…human are they in shape; there is no balance of design in
them。 These are very brief examples; but the whole universe; so far as it
can be investigated; is equally unequal。 No straight line runs through it;
with balanced
curves each side。

Let this thought now be carried into the realms of thought。  The mind; or
circle; or sequence of ideas; acts; or thinks; or exists in a balance; or
what seems a balance to it。  A                          straight line of
thought is set in the centre; with equal branches each side; and with a
generally rounded outline。
But this corresponds to nothing in tangible fact。  Hence I
think; by analogy; we may suppose that neither does it correspond to the
circle of ideas which caused us and all things to be; or; at all events; to
the circle of ideas which
accurately understand us and all things。 There are other ideas altogether。
》From standing face to face so long with the real earth; the real sun; and
the real sea; I am firmly convinced that there is an immense range of
thought quite unknown to us yet。

The problem of my own existence also convinces me that there is much more。
The questions are: Did my soul exist before my body was formed? Or did it
come into life with my body; as a product;
like a flame; of combustion? What will become of it after death? Will it
simply go out like a flame and become non…existent; or will it live for ever
in one or other mode? To these questions
I am unable to find any answer whatsoever。 In our present range of ideas
there is no reply to them。 I may have previously existed; I may not have
previously existed。 I may be a product
of combustion; I may exist on after physical life is suspended;
or I may not。 No demonstration is possible。 But what I want to
say is that the alternatives of extinction or immortality may
not be the only alternatives。 There may be something else; more
wonderful than immortality; and far beyond and above that idea。
There may be something immeasurably superior to it。 As our ideas have run in
circles for centuries; it is difficult to find words to express the idea
that there are other ideas。 For myself; though I cannot fully express
myself; I feel fully convinced that there is a vast immensity of thought; of
existence; and of other things beyond even immortal existence。

CHAPTER IX

IN human affairs everything happens by chancethat is; in defiance of human
ideas; and without any direction of an intelligence。 A man bathes in a pool;
a crocodile seizes and lacerates his flesh。 If any one maintains that an
intelligence directed that cruelty; I can only reply that his mind is under
an illusion。 A man is caught by a revolving shaft and torn to pieces; limb
from limb。 There is no directing intelligence in human affairs; no
protection; and no assistance。 Those who act uprightly are not rewarded; but
they and their children often wander in the utmost indigence。 Those who do
evil are not always punished; but frequently flourish and have happy
children。 Rewards and punishments are purely human institutions; and if
government be relaxed they entirely disappear。 No intelligence whatever
interferes in human affairs。 There is a most senseless belief now prevalent
that effort; and work; and cleverness;
perseverance and industry; are invariably successful。 Were this
the case; every man would enjoy a competence; at least; and be
free from the cares of money。 This is an illusion almost equal
to the superstition of a directing intelligence; which every
fact and every consideration disproves。

How can I adequately express my contempt for the assertion that
all things occur for the best; for a wise and beneficent end;
and are ordered by a humane intelligence! It is the most utter
falsehood and a crime against the human race。 Even in my brief
time I have been contemporary with events of the most horrible
character; as when the mothers in the Balkans cast their own
children from the train to parish in the snow; as when the Princess Alice
foundered; and six hundred human beings were smothered in foul water; as
when the hecatomb of two thousand maidens were burned in the church at
Santiago; as when the miserable creatures tore at the walls of the Vienna
theatre。 Consider only the fates which overtake the little children。 Human
suffering is so great; so endless; so awful that I can hardly write of it。 I
could not go into hospitals and face it; as some do; lest my mind should be
temporarily overcome。 The whole and the worst the worst pessimist can say is
far beneath the least particle of the truth; so immense is the misery of
man。 It is the duty of all rational beings to acknowledge the truth。 There
is not the least trace of directing intelligence in human affairs。  This is
a foundation of hope; because; if the present condition of things were
ordered by a superior power; there would be no possibility of improving it
for the better in the spite of that power。 Acknowledging that no such
direction exists; all things become at once plastic to our will。

The credit given by the unthinking to the statement that all
affairs are directed has been the bane of the world since the
days of the Egyptian papyri and the origin of superstition。 So
long as men firmly believe that everything is fixed for them; so
long is progress impossible。 If you argue yourself into the belief that you
cannot walk to a place; you cannot walk there。
But if you start you can walk there easily。 Any one who will
consider the affairs of the world at large; and of the individual; will see
that they do not proceed in the manner they
would do for our own happiness if a man of humane breadth of
view were placed at their head with unlimited power; such as is
credited to the intelligence which does not exist。 A man of
intellect and humanity could cause everything to happen in an
infinitely superior manner。 Could one like the divine Juliushumane;
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