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the story of my heart-第13章

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want to be always in company with the sun; and sea; and earth。 These; and
the stars by night; are my natural companions。My heart looks back and
sympathises with all the joy and life of ancient time。 With the circling
dance burned in still attitude on the vase; with the chase and the hunter
eagerly pursuing; whose javelin trembles to be thrown; with the extreme fury
of feeling; the whirl of joy in the warriors from Marathon to the last
battle of Rome; not with the slaughter; but with the passionthe life in
the passion; with the garlands and the flowers; with all the breathing busts
that have panted beneath the sun。 O beautiful human life! Tears come in my
eyes as I think of it。 So beautiful; so inexpressibly beautiful!

So deep is the passion of life that; if it were possible to live
again; it must be exquisite to die pushing the eager breast
against the sword。 In the flush of strength to face the sharp
pain joyously; and laugh in the last glance of the sunif only
to live again; now on earth; were possible。 So subtle is the
chord of life that sometimes to watch troops marching in rhythmic order;
undulating along the column as the feet are lifted; brings tears in my eyes。
Yet could I have in my own heart all the passion; the love and joy; burned
in the breasts that have panted; breathing deeply; since the hour of Ilion;
yet still I should desire more。 How willingly I would strew the paths of all
with flowers; how beautiful a delight to make the world joyous! The song
should never be silent; the dance never still; the laugh should sound like
water which runs for ever。

I would submit to a severe discipline; and to go without many
things cheerfully; for the good and happiness of the human race
in the future。 Each one of us should do something; however small; towards
that great end。 At the present time the labour of our predecessors in this
country; in all other countries of the earth; is entirely wasted。 We
livethat is; we snatch an existenceand ourworks become nothing。 The
piling up of fortunes; the building of cities; the establishment of immense
commerce; ends in a cipher。 These objects are so outside my idea that I
cannot understand them; and look upon the struggle in amazement。 Not even
the pressure of poverty can force upon me an understanding of; and sympathy
with; these things。 It is the human being as the human being of whom I
think。 That the human being as the human being; nudeapart altogether from
money; clothing; houses; propertiesshould enjoy greater health; strength;
safety; beauty; and happiness; I would gladly agree to a discipline like
that of Sparta。 The Spartan method did produce the finest race of men; and
Sparta was famous in antiquity for the most beautiful women。 So far;
therefore; it fits exactly to my ideas。

No science of modern times has yet discovered a plan to meet the
requirements of the millions who live now; no plan by which they might
attain similar physical proportion。 Some increase of longevity; some slight
improvement in the general health is promised; and these are great things;
but far; far beneath the ideal。 Probably the whole mode of thought of the
nations must be altered before physical progress is possible。 Not while
money; furniture; affected show and the pageantry of wealth are the
ambitions of the multitude can the multitude become ideal in form。 When the
ambition of the multitude is fixed on the ideal of form and beauty; then
that ideal will become immediately possible; and a marked advance towards it
could be made in three generations。  Glad; indeed; should I be to discover
something that would help towards this end。

How pleasant it would be each day to think; To…day I have done
something that will tend to render future generations more
happy。 The very thought would make this hour sweeter。  It is absolutely
necessary that something of this kind should be discovered。 First; we must
lay down the axiom that as yet nothing has been found; we have nothing to
start with; all has to be begun afresh。 All courses or methods of human life
have hitherto been failures。 Some course of life is needed based on things
that are; irrespective of tradition。 The physical ideal must be kept
steadily in view。

CHAPTER VIII

AN enumeration of the useless would almost be an enumeration of
everything hitherto pursued。 For instance; to go back as far as
possible; the study and labour expended on Egyptian inscriptions
and papyri; which contain nothing but doubtful; because laudatory history;
invocations to idols; and similar matters: all these labours are in vain。
Take a broom and sweep the papyri away into the dust。 The Assyrian
terra…cotta tablets; some recording fables; and some even saddercontracts
between men whose bodies were dust twenty centuries sincetake a hammer
and demolish them。 Set a battery to beat down the pyramids; and
a mind…battery to destroy the deadening influence of tradition。
The Greek statue lives to this day; and has the highest use of
all; the use of true beauty。 The Greek and Roman philosophers
have the value of furnishing the mind with material to think
from。 Egyptian and Assyrian; mediaeval and eighteenth…century
culture; miscalled; are all alike mere dust; and absolutely
useless。

There is a mass of knowledge so called at the present day
equally useless; and nothing but an encumbrance。 We are forced
by circumstances to become familiar with it; but the time
expended on it is lost。 No physical idealfar less any soul…
idealwill ever be reached by it。 In a recent generation
erudition in the text of the classics was considered the most
honourable of pursuits; certainly nothing could be less valuable。 In our own
generation; another species of erudition
is laudederudition in the laws of matterwhich; in itself; is
but one degree better。 The study of matter for matter's sake is
despicable; if any can turn that study to advance the ideal of life; it
immediately becomes most valuable。 But not without the human ideal。 It is
nothing to me if the planets revolve around the sun; or the sun around the
earth; unless I can thereby gather an increase of body or mind。 As the
conception of the planets revolving around the sun; the present astronomical
conception of the heavens; is distinctly grander than that of Ptolemy; it is
therefore superior; and a gain to the human mind。 So with other sciences;
not immediately useful; yet if they furnish the mind with material of
thought; they are an advance。

But not in themselvesonly in conjunction with the human ideal。
Once let that slip out of the thought; and science is of no
more use than the invocations in the Egyptian papyri。 The world would be the
gainer if the Nile rose and swept away pyramid and tomb; sarcophagus;
papyri; and inscription; for it seems as if most of the superstitions which
still to this hour; in our own country; hold minds in their sway; originated
in Egypt。 The world would be the gainer if a Nile flood of new thought arose
and swept away the past; concentrating the effort of all the races of the
earth upon man's body; that it might reach an ideal of shape; and health;
and happiness。

Nothing is of any use unless it gives me a stronger body and
mind; a more beautiful body; a happy existence; and a soul…life
now。 The last phase of philosophy is equally useless with the
rest。 The belief that the human mind was evolved; in the process of
unnumbered years; from a fragment of palpitating slime through a thousand
gradations; is a modern superstition; and proceeds upon assumption alone。

Nothing is evolved; no evolution takes place; there is no record
of such an event; it is pure assertion。 The theory fascinates
many; because they find; upon study of physiology; that the
gradations between animal and vegetable are so fine and so close together;
as if a common web bound them together。 But although they stand so near they
never change places。 They are like the
figures on the face of a clock; there are minute dots between;
apparently connecting each with the other; and the hands move
round over all。 Yet ten never becomes twelve; and each second
even is parted from the next; as you may hear by listening to
the beat。 So the gradations of life; past and present; though
standing close together never change places。 Nothing is evolved。
There is no evolution any more than there is any design in nature。  By
standing face to face with nature; and not from books; I have convinced
myself that there is no design and no evolution。 What there is; what was the
cause; how and why; is not yet known; certainly it was neither of these。

But it may be argued the world must have been created; or it
must have been made of existing things; or it must have been
evolved; or it must have existed for ever; through all eternity。
I think not。 I do not think that either of these are 〃musts;〃 nor that any
〃must〃 has yet been discovered; not even that there 〃must〃 be a first cause。
There may be other thingsother physical forces evenof which we know
nothing。 I strongly suspect there are。  There may be other ideas altogether
from any we have hitherto had the use of。 For many ages our ideas have been
confined to two or three。 We have conceived the 
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