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rh.royalassassin-第69章

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       He sighed。 He glanced about my room; then walked over to stand before the tapestry of King Wisdom greeting the Elderling。 He glanced up at it; then smiled sourly; finding some humor there I had never seen。 He assumed the stance of a poet about to recite。 Then he halted; looked at me squarely once more。 〃You are certain you wish to know; Fitzy…fitz?〃
       Like a liturgy; I repeated the question。 〃Whence es the Fool and why?〃
       〃Whence? Ah; whence?〃 He went nose to nose with Ratsy for a moment; formulating a reply to his own question。 Then he met my eyes。 〃Go south; Fitz。 To lands past the edges of every map that Verity has ever seen。 And past the edges of the maps made in those countries as well。 Go south; and then east across a sea you have no name for。 Eventually; you would e to a long peninsula; and on its snaking tip you would find the village where a Fool was born。 You might even find; still; a mother who recalled her wormy…white babe; and how she cradled me against her warm breast and sang。〃 He glanced up at my incredulous; enraptured face and gave a short laugh。 〃You cannot even picture it; can you? Let me make it harder for you。 Her hair was long and dark and curling; and her eyes were green。 Fancy that! Of such rich colors was this transparency made。 And the fathers of the colorless child? Two cousins; for that was the custom of that land。 One broad and swarthy and full of laughter; ruddy…lipped and brown…eyed; a farmer smelling of rich earth and open air。 The other as narrow as the one was wide; and gold to his bronze; a poet and songster; blue…eyed。 And; oh; how they loved me and rejoiced in me! All the three of them; and the village as well。 I was so loved。〃 His voice grew soft; and for a moment he fell silent。 I knew with great certainty that I was hearing what no other had ever heard from him。 I remembered the time I had ventured into his room; and the exquisite little doll in its cradle that I had found there。 Cherished as the Fool had once been cherished。 I waited。
       〃When I was 。。。 old enough; I bade them all farewell。 I set off to find my place in history; and choose where I would thwart it。 This was the place I selected; the time had been destined by the hour of my birth。 I came here; and became Shrewd's。 I gathered up whatever threads the fates put into my hands; and I began to twist them and color them as I could; in the hopes of affecting what was woven after me。〃
       I shook my head。 〃I don't understand a thing you just said。〃
       〃Ah。〃 He shook his head; setting his bells to jingling。 〃I offered to tell you my secret。 I didn't promise to make you understand it。〃
       〃A message is not delivered until it is understood;〃 I countered。 This was a direct quote from Chade。
       The Fool teetered on accepting it。 〃You do understand what I said;〃 he promised。 〃You simply do not accept it。 Never before have I spoken so plainly to you。 Perhaps that is what confuses you。〃
       He was serious。 I shook my head again。 〃You make no sense! You went somewhere to discover your place in history? How can that be? History is what is done and behind us。〃
       He shook his head; slowly this time。 〃History is what we do in our lives。 We create it as we go along。〃 He smiled enigmatically。 〃The future is another kind of history。〃
       〃No man can know the future;〃 I agreed。
       His smile widened。 〃Cannot they?〃 he asked in a whisper。 〃Perhaps; Fitz; somewhere; there is written down all that is the future。 Not written down by one person; know; but if the hints and visions and premonitions and foreseeings of an entire race were written down; and cross…referenced and related to one another; might not such a people create a loom to hold the weaving of the future?〃
       〃Preposterous;〃 I objected。 〃How would anyone know if any of it were true?〃
       〃If such a loom were made; and such a tapestry of predictions woven; not for a few years; but for tens of hundreds of years; after a time it could be shown that it presented a surprisingly accurate foretelling。 Bear in mind that those who keep these records are another race; an exceedingly long…lived one。 A pale lovely race; that occasionally mingled its bloodlines with that of men。 And then! 〃 He spun in a circle; suddenly fey; pleased insufferably with himself。 〃And then; when certain ones were born; ones marked so clearly that history must recall them; they are called to step forward; to find their places in that future history。 And they might further be exhorted to examine that place; that juncture of a hundred threads; and say; these threads; here; these are the ones I shall tweak; and in the tweaking; I shall change the tapestry; I shall warp the weft; alter the color of what is to e。 I shall change the destiny of the world。〃
       He was mocking me。 I was certain of it now。 〃Once; in perhaps a thousand years; there may e a man capable of making such a great change in the world。 A powerful King; perhaps; or a philosopher; shaping the thoughts of thousands。 But you and I; Fool? We are pawns。 Ciphers。〃
       He shook his head pityingly。 〃This; more than anything else; is what I have never understood about your people。 You can roll dice; and understand that the whole game may hinge on one turn of a die。 You deal out cards; and say that all a man's fortune for the night may turn upon one hand。 But a man's whole life; you sniff at; and say; what; this naught of a human; this fisherman; this carpenter; this thief; this cook; why; what can they do in the great wide world? And so you putter and sputter your lives away; like candles burning in a draft。〃
       〃Not all men are destined for greatness;〃 I reminded him。
       〃Are you sure; Fitz? Are you sure? What good is a life lived as if it made no difference at all to the great life of the world? A sadder thing I cannot imagine。 Why should not a mother say to herself; if I raise this child aright; if I love and care for her; she shall live a life that brings joy to those about her; and thus I have changed the world? Why should not the farmer that plants a seed say to his neighbor; this seed I plant today will feed someone; and that is how I change the world today?〃
       〃This is philosophy; Fool。 I have never had time to study such things。〃
       〃No; Fitz; this is life。 And no one has time not to think of such things。 Each creature in the world should consider this thing; every moment of the heart's beating。 Otherwise; what is the point of arising each day?〃
       〃Fool; this is beyond me;〃 I declared uneasily。 I had never seen him so impassioned; never heard him speak so plainly。 It was as if I had stirred gray…coated embers and suddenly found the cherry…red coal that glowed in their depths。 He burned too brightly。
       〃No; Fitz。 I have e to believe it is through you。〃 He reached out and tapped me lightly with Ratsy。 〃Keystone。 Gate。 Crossroads。 Catalyst。 All these you have been; and continue to be。 Whenever I e to a crossroads; whenever the scent is uncertain; when I put my nose to the ground; and cast about and bay and snuffle; I find one scent。 Yours。 You create possibilities。 While you exist; the future can be steered。 I came here for you; Fitz。 You are the thread I tweak。 One of them; anyway。 〃
       I felt a sudden chill of foreboding。 Whatever more he had to say; I did not wish to hear it。 Somewhere; far away; a thin howl arose。 A wolf baying in midday。 A shiver ran up me; setting up every hair on my body。 〃You've had your joke;〃 I said; laughing nervously。 〃I should have known better than to expect a real secret from you。〃
       〃You。 Or not you。 Linchpin; anchor; knot in the line。 I have seen the end of the world; Fitz。 Seen it woven as plainly as I've seen my birth。 Oh; not in your lifetime; nor even mine。 But shall we be happy; to say that we live in the dusk rather than in the full night? Shall we rejoice that we shall only suffer; while your offspring will be the ones to know the torments of the damned? Shall this be why we do not act?〃
       〃Fool。 I wish not to hear this。〃
       〃You had a chance to deny me。 But thrice you demanded it; and hear it you shall。〃 He lifted his staff as if leading a charge; and spoke as if he addressed the full Council of the Six Duchies。 〃The fall of the Kingdom of the Six Duchies was the pebble that started the landslide。 The soulless ones moved on from there; spreading like a bloodstain down the world's best shirt。 Darkness devours; and is never satiated until it feeds upon itself。 And all because the line of House Farseer failed。 That is the future as it is woven。 But wait! Farseer?〃 He cocked his head and peered at me; considering as a gore…crow。 〃Why do they call you that; Fitz? What have your ancestors ever foreseen afar to gain such a name? Shall I tell you how it es about? The very name of your house is the future reaching back in time to you; and naming you by the name that someday your house will deserve。 The Farseers。 That was the clue I took to my heart。 That the future reached back to you; to your house; to where your bloodlines intersected with my lifetime; and named you so。 I came here; and what did I discover? One Farseer; with no name at all。 Unnamed in any history; past or future。 But I have seen you take a n
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