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ggk.thelionsofal-rassan-第108章

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; because Ishak ben Yonannon was still…after five years in darkness…the most courageous and the most gifted surgeon alive。 Who; after tonight; would deny it? Who would dare?
  Jehane shook her head。 False pride。 Did such things matter so much; now? They didn't; and yet they did。 In the presence of war; on the brink of so many deaths to e; Ishak had reclaimed a life that was lost。 No physician…and certainly not his daughter…could be immune to the sense of a small; precious victory won back from the dark。
  She nodded and the soldier withdrew with his torch。 Jehane settled back beside the unconscious boy。 She had ordered Ammar to snatch some rest before morning; she might be able to let herself doze; after all。
  〃He is all right?〃
  It was the mother。 Rodrigo's wife。 Jehane; looking across at her in the darkness; thought of all the elaborately bloodthirsty stories he had told of her。 And now here was a small; very beautiful woman lying on the cold ground beside her child; speaking with fear in her voice。
  〃He is doing well。 He might wake in the morning。 He needs to sleep now。〃
  Her eyes were adjusting to the dark again。 She could make out the other woman a little more clearly; on the far side of Diego。
  〃D'Inigo told me 。。。 that no one has ever done this surgery。〃
  〃That is true。〃
  〃Your father 。。。 he was blinded for saving someone's life?〃
  〃Mother and infant。 In childbirth。 He touched an Asharite woman to do so。〃
  Miranda Belmonte shook her head。 〃How is it that we do these things to each other?〃
  〃I have no answer for that; my lady。〃
  There was a silence。
  〃Rodrigo mentioned you many times;〃 Miranda said softly。 〃In his letters。 He had nothing but praise for you。 His Kindath physician。〃 Jehane thought she saw the ghost of a smile。 〃I was jealous。〃
  Jehane shook her head。 〃No one loved as much as you are should ever be jealous。〃
  〃I know that; actually;〃 said Miranda Belmonte。 〃It is the great gift of my life。 If Diego lives; because of your father; that will be two such gifts。 It is too much。 I am not worthy。 It makes me afraid。〃
  There was a longer silence。 A moment later Jehane realized that the other woman had drifted to sleep again。
  She sat beside the sleeping boy; leaning against a heavy sack of dried goods someone kind had placed nearby。 She thought of deaths and births; sight and blindness; moons and sun and stars。 Ashar and Jad at war; rain falling on the Kindath as they wandered the world。 She thought of love and of one day bearing a child of her own。
  She heard footsteps approaching and knew who it was。 She had been certain; in fact; somewhere deep within herself; that this last conversation lay waiting in the night。
  〃How is he?〃 asked Rodrigo quietly; crouching beside her。 He was looking down at his son。 His face was in darkness。
  〃As well as we can hope。 I told your wife he may wake in the morning。〃
  〃I'll want to be here。〃
  〃Of course。〃
  Rodrigo stood up。 〃Walk with me?〃
  She had known。 How had she known? How did the heart see what it did?
  〃Not far from him;〃 she murmured; but rose and they walked a little apart; past the soldier with the torch。 They stopped by the river; near a small hut Jehane remembered。 One of the few that hadn't burned last year。 Garcia de Rada's cousin had killed a woman here; and an unborn child。 Her life seemed to have circled back to this place。 She had met Rodrigo that night and Ammar that day。 Both of them。
  It was very quiet。 They listened to the river。 Rodrigo said; 〃You know your parents are safe with us。 This is 。。。 the best possible place for them right now。〃
  〃I believe that。〃
  〃Jehane。 It is 。。。 probably the best place for you; as well。〃
  She had known he would say that。 She shook her head。 〃Safest; perhaps。 Not best。〃 She left the deeper words unsaid; but with Rodrigo they didn't have to be spoken。
  Another silence。 The moons had swung west; and the slow stars。 The river murmured below。
  〃I've asked Husari to stay with me。 He has agreed。 I told the king a small lie tonight。〃
  〃I guessed。 You don't really think Lain and Martin will be unable to get the pany out; do you?〃
  '〃Not really。 And Husari; in his way; may be as good a governor…in Fezana; or elsewhere…as Ammar would have been。〃
  〃Will he do it?〃
  〃I believe so。 He will not serve the Muwardis。 And he; at least; trusts me; if Ammar does not。〃
  She heard the bitterness。 〃It isn't a question of trust。 You know that。〃
  〃I suppose。〃 He looked at her。 〃I wanted to be sure he could leave; if he insisted; so I made up that story about my pany trapped in Ragosa。〃
  〃I know that; Rodrigo。〃
  〃I didn't want him to go。〃
  〃I know that; too。〃
  〃I don't want you to go; Jehane。 There is no place in Al…Rassan for you; for either of you; when the Muwardis e。〃
  〃We'll have to try to make a place;〃 she said。
  Stillness。 He was waiting; she realized; and so she did say it; after all。 〃I will not leave him; Rodrigo。〃
  She heard him release his breath。
  In the darkness by the river's steady; murmurous flow; Jehane said; looking down at the water; not at the man beside her; 〃I was under your window at Carnival。 I stood there a long time; looking at your light。〃 She swallowed。 〃I almost came up to you。〃
  She sensed him turning towards her。 She kept her gaze fixed upon the river。
  〃Why didn't you?〃 His voice had altered。
  〃Because of what you told me that afternoon。〃
  〃I was buying paper; I remember。 What did I tell you; Jehane?〃
  She did look at him then。 It was dark; but she knew those features by heart now。 They had ridden from this hamlet the summer before on the one horse。 So little time ago; really。
  〃You told me how much you loved your wife。〃
  〃I see;〃 he said。
  Jehane looked away。 She needed to look away。 They had e to a place too hard for held glances。 She said softly; to the river; to the dark; 〃Is it wrong; or impossible; for a woman to love two men?〃
  After what seemed to her a very long time; Rodrigo Belmonte said; 〃No more so than for a man。〃
  Jehane closed her eyes。
  〃Thank you;〃 she said。 And then; after another moment; holding as tightly as she could to the thing suspended there; 〃Goodbye。〃
  With her words the moment passed; the world moved on again: time; the flowing river; the moons。 And the delicate thing that had been in the air between them…whatever it might have been named…fell; as it seemed to Jehane; softly to rest in the grass by the water。
  〃Goodbye;〃 he said。 〃Be always blessed; on all the paths of your life。 My dear。〃 And then he said her name。
  They did not touch。 They walked back beside each other to the place where Diego and Fernan and Miranda Belmonte lay asleep and; after standing a long moment gazing down upon his family; Rodrigo Belmonte went towards the king's tent where the strategies of war were being devised。
  She watched him go。 She saw him lift the tent flap; to be lit briefly by the lanterns from inside; then disappear within as the tent closed after him。
  Goodbye。 Goodbye。 Goodbye。
  
  Jehane saw Diego's eyes open in the greyness before sunrise。
  He was weak; and in considerable pain; but he recognized his father and mother; and managed the beginnings of a smile。 It was Fernan who knelt beside him; though; gripping both his hands。 Bernart d'Inigo stood behind them all; grinning ferociously; then Ishak came out to see his patient; to take his pulse and feel the shape of the wound。
  They had no need of her。 Jehane used the moment to walk a little apart with her mother and tell her what she was about to do; and why。 It did not greatly surprise her to discover that Eliane and Ishak had already learned most of this from Amman
  It appeared he had been waiting outside their tent when they woke。 She had a memory of him kneeling before Ishak the summer before。 The two of them had known each other a long time; she'd realized that day; and Ammar ibn Khairan was not a man to ride away with their daughter without a word of his own spoken。
  She wondered what had been said。 What did surprise her was to encounter no protest。 Her mother had never been hesitant with objections。 Yet now Jehane was about to ride off through a land at war; with an Asharite; towards a future only the moons knew…and her mother was accepting that。
  It was; Jehane thought; another measure of how much had changed。
  Mother and daughter embraced。 Neither wept; but Jehane did do so when her father held her in his arms just before she mounted the horse provided for her。
  She looked at Alvar de Pellino standing silently nearby; his heart in his eyes; as ever。 She looked at Husari。 At Rodrigo。
  She looked at Ammar ibn Khairan beside her on his mount and nodded her head and they rode away together。 East towards Fezana and then past it; well north of the river; watching the plumes of smoke still coiling up from the city into the brightening sky。
  She looked back only once; but Orvilla was already out of sight and she had stopped crying by then。 She had set out on this same path a summer ago; riding with Alvar and Velaz。 She had only one man with her now; but he was worth a hundred an
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