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usual height。
'No； I can't smoke；' said the youth； in reply to the observation of
the other； 'I have often tried； but could never succeed to my
satisfaction。'
'Is it possible to become a good German without smoking？' said the
senior； half speaking to himself。
'I daresay not；' said the youth； 'but I shan't break my heart on
that account。'
'As for breaking your heart； of course you would never think of
such a thing； he is a fool who breaks his heart on any account； but
it is good to be a German； the Germans are the most philosophic
people in the world； and the greatest smokers： now I trace their
philosophy to their smoking。'
'I have heard say their philosophy is all smoke … is that your
opinion？'
'Why； no； but smoking has a sedative effect upon the nerves； and
enables a man to bear the sorrows of this life （of which every one
has his share） not only decently； but dignifiedly。 Suicide is not
a national habit in Germany as it is in England。'
'But that poor creature； Werther； who committed suicide； was a
German。'
'Werther is a fictitious character； and by no means a felicitous
one； I am no admirer either of Werther or his author。 But I should
say that； if there ever was a Werther in Germany； he did not smoke。
Werther； as you very justly observe； was a poor creature。'
'And a very sinful one； I have heard my parents say that suicide is
a great crime。'
'Broadly； and without qualification； to say that suicide is a
crime； is speaking somewhat unphilosophically。 No doubt suicide；
under many circumstances； is a crime； a very heinous one。 When the
father of a family； for example； to escape from certain
difficulties； commits suicide； he commits a crime； there are those
around him who look to him for support； by the law of nature； and
he has no right to withdraw himself from those who have a claim
upon his exertions； he is a person who decamps with other people's
goods as well as his own。 Indeed； there can be no crime which is
not founded upon the depriving others of something which belongs to
them。 A man is hanged for setting fire to his house in a crowded
city； for he burns at the same time or damages those of other
people； but if a man who has a house on a heath sets fire to it； he
is not hanged； for he has not damaged or endangered any other
individual's property； and the principle of revenge； upon which all
punishment is founded； has not been aroused。 Similar to such a
case is that of the man who； without any family ties； commits
suicide； for example； were I to do the thing this evening； who
would have a right to call me to account？ I am alone in the world；
have no family to support； and； so far from damaging any one；
should even benefit my heir by my accelerated death。 However； I am
no advocate for suicide under any circumstances； there is something
undignified in it； unheroic； un…Germanic。 But if you must commit
suicide … and there is no knowing to what people may be brought …
always contrive to do it as decorously as possible； the decencies；
whether of life or of death； should never be lost sight of。 I
remember a female Quaker who committed suicide by cutting her
throat； but she did it decorously and decently： kneeling down over
a pail； so that not one drop fell upon the floor； thus exhibiting
in her last act that nice sense of neatness for which Quakers are
distinguished。 I have always had a respect for that woman's
memory。'
And here； filling his pipe from the canister； and lighting it at
the taper； he recommenced smoking calmly and sedately。
'But is not suicide forbidden in the Bible？' the youth demanded。
'Why； no； but what though it were！ … the Bible is a respectable
book； but I should hardly call it one whose philosophy is of the
soundest。 I have said that it is a respectable book； I mean
respectable from its antiquity； and from containing； as Herder
says； 〃the earliest records of the human race；〃 though those
records are far from being dispassionately written； on which
account they are of less value than they otherwise might have been。
There is too much passion in the Bible； too much violence； now； to
come to all truth； especially historic truth； requires cool
dispassionate investigation； for which the Jews do not appear to
have ever been famous。 We are ourselves not famous for it； for we
are a passionate people； the Germans are not … they are not a
passionate people … a people celebrated for their oaths； we are。
The Germans have many excellent historic writers； we 。 。 。 'tis
true we have Gibbon 。 。 。 You have been reading Gibbon … what do
you think of him？'
'I think him a very wonderful writer。'
'He is a wonderful writer … one SUI GENERIS … uniting the
perspicuity of the English … for we are perspicuous … with the cool
dispassionate reasoning of the Germans。 Gibbon sought after the
truth； found it； and made it clear。'
'Then you think Gibbon a truthful writer？'
'Why； yes； who shall convict Gibbon of falsehood？ Many people have
endeavoured to convict Gibbon of falsehood； they have followed him
in his researches； and have never found him once tripping。 Oh； he
is a wonderful writer！ his power of condensation is admirable； the
lore of the whole world is to be found in his pages。 Sometimes in
a single note he has given us the result of the study of years； or；
to speak metaphorically； 〃he has ransacked a thousand Gulistans；
and has condensed all his fragrant booty into a single drop of
otto。〃'
'But was not Gibbon an enemy to the Christian faith？'
'Why； no； he was rather an enemy to priestcraft； so am I； and when
I say the philosophy of the Bible is in many respects unsound； I
always wish to make an exception in favour of that part of it which
contains the life and sayings of Jesus of Bethlehem； to which I
must always concede my unqualified admiration … of Jesus； mind you；
for with his followers and their dogmas I have nothing to do。 Of
all historic characters Jesus is the most beautiful and the most
heroic。 I have always been a friend to hero…worship； it is the
only rational one； and has always been in use amongst civilised
people … the worship of spirits is synonymous with barbarism … it
is mere fetish； the savages of West Africa are all spirit…
worshippers。 But there is something philosophic in the worship of
the heroes of the human race； and the true hero is the benefactor。
Brahma； Jupiter； Bacchus； were all benefactors； and； therefore；
entitled to the worship of their respective peoples。 The Celts
worshipped Hesus； who taught them to plough； a highly useful art。
We； who have attained a much higher state of civilisation than the
Celts ever did； worship Jesus； the first who endeavoured to teach
men to behave decently and decorously under all circumstances； who
was the foe of vengeance； in which there is something highly
indecorous； who had first the courage to lift his voice against
that violent dogma； 〃an eye for an eye〃； who shouted conquer； but
conquer with kindness； who said put up the sword； a violent
unphilosophic weapon； and who finally died calmly and decorously in
defence of his philosophy。 He must be a savage who denies worship
to the hero of Golgotha。'
'But he was something more than a hero； he was the Son of God；
wasn't he？'
The elderly individual made no immediate answer； but； after a few
more whiffs from his pipe； exclaimed； 'Come； fill your glass！ How
do you advance with your translation of TELL'？
'It is nearly finished； but I do not think I shall proceed with it；
I begin to think the original somewhat dull。'
'There you are wrong； it is the masterpiece of Schiller； the first
of German poets。'
'It may be so；' said the youth。 'But； pray excuse me； I do not
think very highly of German poetry。 I have lately been reading
Shakespeare； and； when I turn from him to the Germans … even the
best of them … they appear mere pigmies。 You will pardon the
liberty I perhaps take in saying so。'
'I like that every one should have an opinion of his own；' said the
elderly individual； 'and； what is more； declare it。 Nothing
displeases me more than to see people assenting to everything that
they hear said； I at once come to the conclusion that they are
either hypocrites； or there is nothing in them。 But； with respect
to Shakespeare； whom I have not read for thirty years； is he not
rather given to bombast； 〃crackling bombast；〃 as I think I have
said in one of my essays？'
'I daresay he is；' said the youth； 'but I can't help thinking him
the greatest of all poets； not even excepting Homer。 I would
sooner have written that series of plays； founded on the fortunes
of the House of Lancaster； than the ILIAD itself。 The events
described are as lofty as those sung by Home