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But I had my reason too。 If I disapproved of the resolution at which
Nugent had arrived； I viewed far more unfavorably the selfish weakness on
Oscar's part； which had allowed his brother to sacrifice himself。
Lucilla's lover had sunk to something very like a despicable character in
my estimation。 I felt that I might let him see what I thought of him； if
I found myself in his company at that moment。
〃Considering the object that you have in view； my dear；〃 I said to
Lucilla； 〃do you think you want _me_ at Browndown？〃
〃Haven't I already told you？〃 she asked impatiently。 〃I am so nervousso
completely upsetthat I don't feel equal to going out by myself。 Have
you no sympathy for me？ Suppose _you_ had dreamed that you were marrying
Nugent instead of Oscar？〃
〃Ah； bah！ what of that？ I should only have dreamed that I was marrying
the most agreeable man of the two。〃
〃The most agreeable man of the two！ There you are againalways unjust to
Oscar。〃
〃My love！ if you could see for yourself； you would learn to appreciate
Nugent's good qualities； as I do。〃
〃I prefer appreciating Oscar's good qualities。〃
〃You are prejudiced； Lucilla。〃
〃So are you！〃
〃You happen to have met Oscar first。〃
〃That has nothing to do with it。〃
〃Yes！ yes！ If Nugent had followed us； instead of Oscar； if； of those two
charming voices which are both the same； one had spoken instead of the
other〃
〃I won't hear a word more！〃
〃Tra…la…la…la！ It happens to have been Oscar。 Turn it the other wayand
Nugent might have been the man。
〃Madame Pratolungo； I am not accustomed to be insulted！ I have no more to
say to you。〃
With that dignified reply； and with the loveliest color in her face that
you ever saw in your life； my darling Lucilla turned her pretty back on
me； and set off for Browndown by herself。
Ah； my rash tongue！ Ah； my nasty foreign temper！ Why did I let her
irritate me？ I； the elder of the twowhy did I not set her an example of
self…control？ Who can tell？ When does a woman know why she does anything？
Did Eve knowwhen Mr。 Serpent offered her the applewhy she ate it？ not
she！
What was to be done now？ Two things were to be done。 First thing：To
cool myself down。 Second thing：To follow Lucilla； and kiss and make it
up。
Either I took some time to coolor； in the irritation of the moment；
Lucilla walked faster than usual。 She had got to Browndown before I could
overtake her。 On opening the house…door； I heard them talking。 It would
hardly do to disturb themespecially now I was in disgrace。 While I was
hesitating； and wondering what my next proceeding had better be； my eye
was attracted by a letter lying on the hall…table。 I looked （one is
always inquisitive in those idle moments when one doesn't know what to
do）I looked at the address。 The letter was directed to Nugent； and the
post…mark was Liverpool。
I drew the inevitable conclusion。 The German oculist was in England！
CHAPTER THE TWENTY…EIGHTH
He crosses the Rubicon
I WAS still in doubt； whether to enter the room； or to wait outside until
she left Browndown to return to the rectorywhen Lucilla's keen sense of
hearing decided the question which I had been unable to settle for
myself。 The door of the room opened； and Oscar advanced into the hall。
〃Lucilla insisted that she heard somebody outside；〃 he said。 〃Who could
have guessed it was you？ Why did you wait in the hall？ Come in！ come in！〃
He held open the door for me； and I went in。 Oscar announced me to
Lucilla。 〃It was Madame Pratolungo you heard；〃 he said。 She took no
notice either of him or of me。 A heap of flowers from Oscar's garden lay
in her lap。 With the help of her clever fingers； she was sorting them to
make a nosegay； as quickly and as tastefully as if she had possessed the
sense of sight。 In all my experience of that charming face； it had never
looked so hard as it looked now。 Nobody would have recognized her
likeness to the Madonna of Raphael's picture。 Offendedmortally offended
with meI saw it at a glance。
〃I hope you will forgive my intrusion； Lucilla； when you know my motive；〃
I said。 〃I have followed you here to make my excuses。〃
〃Oh； don't think of making excuses！〃 she rejoined； giving three…fourths
of her attention to the flowers； and one…fourth to me。 〃It's a pity you
took the trouble of coming here。 I quite agree with what you said in the
garden。 Considering the object I had in view at Browndown； I could not
possibly expect you to accompany me。 True！ quite true！〃
I kept my temper。 Not that I am a patient woman： not that I possess a
meek disposition。 Very far from it； I regret to say。 Nevertheless； I kept
my temperso far。
〃I wish to apologize for what I said in the garden；〃 I resumed。 〃I spoke
thoughtlessly； Lucilla。 It is impossible that I could intentionally
offend you。〃
I might as well have spoken to one of the chairs。 The whole of her
attention became absorbed in the breathless interest of making her
nosegay。
〃_Was_ I offended？〃 she said； addressing herself to the flowers。
〃Excessively foolish of me； if I was。〃 She suddenly became conscious of
my existence。 〃You had a perfect right to express your opinion；〃 she said
loftily。 〃Accept _my_ excuses if I appeared to dispute it。〃
She tossed her pretty head； she showed her brightest color； she tapped
her nice little foot briskly on the floor。 （Oh； Lucilla！ Lucilla！） I
still kept my temper。 More； by this time （I admit；） for Oscar's sake than
for her sake。 He looked so distressed； poor fellowso painfully anxious
to interfere； without exactly knowing how。
〃My dear Lucilla！〃 he began。 〃Surely you might answer Madame
Pratolungo〃
She petulantly interrupted him； with another toss of the heada little
higher than the last。
〃I don't attempt to answer Madame Pratolungo！ I prefer admitting that
Madame Pratolungo may have been quite right。 I dare say I am ready to
fall in love with the first man who comes my way。 I dare sayif I had
met your brother before I met youI should have fallen in love with
_him。_ Quite likely！〃
〃Quite likelyas you say；〃answered poor Oscar； humbly。 〃I am sure I
think it very lucky for _me；_ that you didn't meet Nugent first。〃
She threw her lapful of flowers away from her on the table at which she
was sitting。 She became perfectly furious with him for taking my side。 I
permitted myself （the poor child could not see it； remember）； the
harmless indulgence of a smile。
〃You agree with Madame Pratolungo；〃 she said to him viciously。 〃Madame
Pratolungo thinks your brother a much more agreeable man than you。〃
Humble Oscar shook his head in melancholy acknowledgment of this
self…evident fact。 〃There can be no two opinions about that；〃 he said
resignedly。
She stamped her foot on the carpetand raised quite a little cloud of
dust。 My lungs are occasionally delicate。 I permitted myself another
harmless indulgenceindulgence in a slight cough。 She heard the second
indulgenceand suddenly controlled herself； the instant it reached her
ears。 I am afraid she took my cough as my commentary on what was going
on。
〃Come here； Oscar；〃 she said； with a complete change of tone and manner。
〃Come and sit down by me。〃
Oscar obeyed。
〃Put your arm round my waist。〃
Oscar looked at me。 Having the use of his sight； he was sensible of the
absurd side of the demonstration required of himin the presence of a
third person。 She； poor soul； strong in her blind insensibility to all
shafts of ridicule shot from the eye； cared nothing for the presence of a
third person。 She repeated her commands； in a tone which said sharply；
〃Embrace meI am not to be trifled with。〃
Oscar timidly put his arm round her waistwith an appealing look at me。
She issued another command instantly。
〃Say you love me。〃
Oscar hesitated。
〃Say you love me！〃
Oscar whispered it。
〃Out loud！〃
Endurance has its limits： I began to lose my temper。 She could not have
been more superbly indifferent to my presence； if there had been a cat in
the room instead of a lady。
〃Permit me to inform you；〃 I said； 〃that I have not （as you appear to
suppose） left the room。〃
She took no notice。 She went on with her commands； rising irrepressibly
from one amatory climax to another。
〃Give me a kiss！〃
Unhappy Oscarsacrificed between usblushed。 Stop！ Don't revel
prematurely in the greatest enjoyment a reader hasnamely； catching a
writer out in a mistake。 I have not forgotten that his disfigured
complexion would prevent his blush from showing on the surface。 I beg to
say I saw it under the surfacesaw it in his expression： I repeathe
blushed。
I felt it necessary to assert myself for the second time。
〃I have only one object in remaining in the room； Miss Finch。 I merely
wish to know whether you refuse to accept my excuses。
〃Oscar！ give me a kiss！〃
He still hesitated。 She threw her arm round his neck。 My duty to myself
was plainmy duty was to go。
〃Good afternoon； Mr。 Dubourg；〃 I saidand turned to the door。 She heard
me cross the room； and called to me to stop。 I paused。 There was a glass
on the wall opposite to me。 On the authority of the glass； I beg to
mention that I paused in my most becoming manner。 Grace tempered with
dignity： dignity t