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EURIPIDES
Well then I'll turn me to your prologues now；
Beginning first to test the first beginning
Of this fine poet's plays。 Why he's obscure
Even in the enunciation of the facts。
DIONYSUS
Which of them will you test？
EURIPIDES
Many： but first
Give us that famous one from the Oresteia。
DIONYSUS
St！ Silence all！ Now； Aeschylus； begin。
AESCHYLUS
〃Grave Hermes； witnessing a father's power；
Be thou my saviour and mine aid to…day；
For here I come and hither I return。〃
DIONYSUS
Any fault there？
EURIPIDES
A dozen faults and more。
DIONYSUS
Eh！ why the lines are only three in all。
EURIPIDES
But every one contains a score of faults。
DIONYSUS
Now Aeschylus； keep silent； if you don't
You won't get off with three iambic lines。
AESCHYLUS
Silent for him！
DIONYSUS
If my advice you'll take。
EURIPIDES
Why； at first starting here's a fault skyhigh。
AESCHYLUS （to DIONYSUS）
You see your folly？
DIONYSUS
Have your way； I care not。
AESCHYLUS （to EURIPIDES）
What is my fault？
EURIPIDES
Begin the lines again。
AESCHYLUS
〃Grave Hermes； witnessing a father's power…〃
EURIPIDES
And this beside his murdered father's grave
Orestes speaks？
AESCHYLUS
I say not otherwise。
EURIPIDES
Then does he mean that when his father fell
By craft and violence at a woman's hand；
The god of craft was witnessing the deed？
AESCHYLUS
It was not he： it was the Helper Hermes
He called the grave： and this he showed by adding
It was his sire's prerogative he held。
EURIPIDES
Why this is worse than all。 If from his father
He held this office grave； why then…
DIONYSUS
He was
A graveyard rifler on his father's side。
AESCHYLUS
Bacchus； the wine you drink is stale and fusty。
DIONYSUS
Give him another： （to EURIPIDES） you； look out for faults。
AESCHYLUS
〃Be thou my saviour and mine aid to…day；
For here I come； and hither I return。〃
EURIPIDES
The same thing twice says clever Aeschylus。
DIONYSUS
How twice？
EURIPIDES
Why； just consider： I'll explain。
〃I come； says he； and 〃I return；〃 says he：
It's the same thing； to 〃come〃 and to 〃return。〃
DIONYSUS
Aye； just as if you said； 〃Good fellow； tend me
A kneading trough： likewise； a trough to knead in。〃
AESCHYLUS
It is not so； you everlasting talker；
They're not the same； the words are right enough。
DIONYSUS
How so？ inform me how you use the words。
AESCHYLUS
A man； not banished from his home； may 〃come〃
To any land； with no especial chance。
A home…bound exile both 〃returns〃 and 〃comes。〃
DIONYSUS
O good； by Apollo！
What do you say； Euripides； to that？
EURIPIDES
I say Orestes never did 〃return。〃
He came in secret： nobody recalled him。
DIONYSUS
O good； by Hermes I
（Aside） I've not the least suspicion what he means。
EURIPIDES
Repeat another line。
DIONYSUS
Ay； Aeschylus；
Repeat one instantly： you； mark what's wrong。
AESCHYLUS
〃Now on this funeral mound I call my rather
To hear； to hearken。
EURIPIDES
There he is again。
To 〃hear；〃 to 〃hearken〃； the same thing； exactly。
DIONYSUS
Aye； but he's speaking to the dead； you knave；
Who cannot hear us though we call them thrice。
AESCHYLUS
And how do you make your prologues？
EURIPIDES
You shall hear；
And if you find one single thing said twice；
Or any useless padding； spit upon me。
DIONYSUS
Well； fire away： I'm all agog to hear
Your very accurate and faultless prologues。
EURIPIDES
〃A happy man was Oedipus at first…
AESCHYLUS
Not so； by Zeus； a most unhappy man。
Who； not yet born nor yet conceived； Apollo
Foretold would be his father's murderer。
How could he be a happy man at first？
EURIPIDES
〃Then he became the wretchedest of men。〃
AESCHYLUS
Not so； by Zeus； he never ceased to be。
No sooner born； than they exposed the babe；
（And that in winter）； in an earthen crock；
Lest he should grow a man； and slay his father。
Then with both ankles pierced and swoln； he limped
Away to Polybus： still young； he married
An ancient crone； and her his mother too。
Then scratched out both his eyes。
DIONYSUS
Happy indeed
Had he been Erasinides's colleague！
EURIPIDES
Nonsense； I say my prologues are firstrate。
AESCHYLUS
Nay then； by Zeus； no longer line by line
I'll maul your phrases： but with heaven to aid
I'll smash your prologues with a bottle of oil。
EURIPIDES
You mine with a bottle of oil？
AESCHYLUS
With only one。
You frame your prologues so that each and all
Fit in with a 〃bottle of oil；〃 or 〃coverlet…skin；〃
Or 〃reticule…bag。〃 I'll prove it here； and now。
EURIPIDES
You'll prove it？ You？
AESCHYLUS
I will。
DIONYSUS
Well then； begin。
EURIPIDES
〃Aegyptus； sailing with his fifty sons；
As ancient legends mostly tell the tale；
Touching at Argos〃
AESCHYLUS
Lost his bottle of oil。
EURIPIDES
Hang it； what's that？ Confound that bottle of oil！
Give him another： let him try again。
EURIPIDES
〃Bacchus； who； clad in fawnskins； leaps and bounds
torch and thyrsus in the choral dance along Parnassus〃
AESCHYLUS
Lost his bottle of oil。
DIONYSUS
Ah me； we are stricken…with that bottle again！
Pooh； pooh； that's nothing。 I've a prologue
He'll never tack his bottle of oil to this：
〃No man is blest in every single thing。
One is of noble birth； but lacking means。
Another； baseborn；〃
AESCHYLUS
Lost his bottle of oil。
DIONYSUS
Euripides！
EURIPIDES
Well？
DIONYSUS
Lower your sails； my boy；
This bottle of is going to blow a gale。
EURIPIDES
O； by Demeter； I care one bit；
Now from his hands I'll strike that bottle of oil。
DIONYSUS
Go on then； go： but ware the bottle of oil。
EURIPIDES
〃Once Cadmus； quitting the Sidonian town； Agenor's offspring〃
AESCHYLUS
Lost his bottle of oil。
DIONYSUS
O pray； my man； buy off that bottle of oil；
Or else he'll smash our prologues all to bits。
EURIPIDES
I buy of him？
DIONYSUS
If my advice you'll take。
EURIPIDES
No； no； I've many a prologue yet to say；
To which he can't tack on his bottle of oil。
〃Pelops； the son of Tantalus； while driving
His mares to Pisa〃
AESCHYLUS
Lost his bottle of oil。
DIONYSUS
There！ he tacked on the bottle of oil again。
O for heaven's sake； pay him its price； dear boy；
You'll get it for an obol； spick and span。
EURIPIDES
Not yet； by Zeus； I've plenty of prologues left。
〃Oeneus once reaping〃
AESCHYLUS
Lost his bottle of oil。
EURIPIDES
Pray let me finish one entire line first。
〃Oeneus once reaping an abundant harvest；
Offering the firstfruits〃
AESCHYLUS
Lost his bottle of oil。
DIONYSUS
What； in the act of offering？ Fie！ Who stole it？
EURIPIDES
O don't keep bothering！ Let him try with
〃Zeus； as by Truth's own voice the tale is told；〃
DIONYSUS
No； he'll cut in with 〃Lost his bottle of oil〃 bottle
Those bottles of oil on all your prologues seem
To gather and grow； like styes upon the eye。
Turn to his melodies now for goodness' sake。
EURIPIDES
O I can easily show that he's a poor
Melody…maker； makes all alike。
CHORUS
What； O what will be done！
Strange to think that he dare
Blame the bard who has won；
More than all in our days；
Fame and praise for his lays；
Lays so many and fair。
Much I marvel to hear
What the charge he will bring
'Gainst our tragedy king；
Yea for himself do fear。
EURIPIDES
Wonderful lays！ O yes； you'll see directly。
I'll cut down all his metrical strains to one。
DIONYSUS
And I； I'll take some pebbles； and keep count。
A slight pause； during which the music of a flute is heard。 The
music continues to the end of line ＇EURIPIDES…Hush！ the bee。。。＇ as
an accompaniment to the recitative。
EURIPIDES
〃Lord of Phthia； Achilles； why hearing the
voice of the hero…dividing
Hah！ smiting！ approachest thou not to the rescue？
We； by the lake who abide； are adoring our ancestor Hermes。
Hah！ smiting！ approachest thou not to the rescue？〃
DIONYSUS
O Aeschylus； twice art thou smitten I
EURIPIDES
〃Hearken to me； great king； yea； hearken
Atreides； t