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glance at him。 As he took Hilda's hand he gave her a look of intense�察�
yearning melancholy。 He sighed deeply。 ``Let us go apart��'' he said。
Then he glanced gloomily round and sighed again。
They seated themselves on a bench far away from the music and the
crowds。 He did not speak but repeated his deep sigh。
``Has it made you worse to come�察 �dear��'' Hilda asked anxiously。
``Are you sick��''
``Sick��'' he said in a hollow voice。 ``My soul is sickdying。 My
God� �My God��'' An impressive pause。 ``Ah�察 �child�察 �you do not know
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what suffering isyou who have lived only in these simple�察 �humble
surroundings。''
Hilda was trembling with apprehension。 ``What is it�察�Carl�拭 �You can
tell me。 Let me help you bear it。''
``No� �no� �I must bear it alone。 I must take my dark shadow from
your young life。 I ought not to have come。 I should have fled。 But
love makes me a coward。''
``But I love you�察�Carl��'' she said gently。
``And I have missed youdreadfully�察�dreadfully��''
He rolled his eyes wildly。 ``You torture me��'' he exclaimed�察�seizing
her hand in a dead man's clutch。 ``How CAN I speak��''
Hilda's heart seemed to stand still。 She was pale to the lips�察�and he
could see�察�even in the darkness�察�her eyes grow and startle。
``What is it��'' she murrmured。 ``You know Ican bear anything for
you。''
``Not that tone��'' he groaned。 ``Reproach me� �Revile me� �Be
harsh�察�scornfulbut not those tender accents。''
He felt her hand become cold and he saw terror in her eyes。
``Forgive me��'' she said humbly。 ``I don't know what to say or do。 I
you look so strange。 It makes me feel all queer inside。 Won't you tell
me�察�please��''
He noted with artistic satisfaction that the band was playing passionate
love´music with sobs and sad ecstasies of farewell embraces in it。 He
kissed her�察�then drew back。 ``No��'' he groaned。 ``Those lips are not for
me�察 �accursed that I am。'' She was no longer looking at him�察 �but sat
gazing straight ahead�察 �her shoulders bent as if she were crouching to
receive a blow。 He began in a low voice�察�and�察�as he spoke�察�it rose or fell
as his words and the distant music prompted him。 ``Mine has been a
luckless life��'' he said。 ``I have been a football of destiny�察 �kicked and
flung about�察 �hither and yon。 Again and again I have thought in my
despair to lay me down and die。 But something has urged me on�察�on�察�on。
And at last I met you。''
He paused and groanedpartly because it was the proper place�察�partly
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with vexation。 Here was a speech to thrill�察 �yet she sat there inert�察 �her
face a stupid blank。 He was not even sure that she had heard。
``Are you listening��'' he asked in a stern aside�察�a curious mingling of
the actor and the stage manager。
``II don't know��'' she answered�察�startling。 ``I feel sosoqueer。 I
don't seem to be able to pay attention。'' She looked at him timidly and
her chin quivered。 ``Don't you love me any more��''
``Love you�拭 �Would that I did not� �But I must onmy time is short。
How can you say I do not love you when my soul is like a raging fire��''
She shook her head slowly。 ``Your voice don't feel like it��'' she said。
``What is it�拭 �What are you going to say��''
He sighed and looked away from her with an irritated expression。
``Little stupid��'' he mutteredshe didn't appreciate him and he was a fool
to expect it。 But ``art for art's sake''�察�and he went on in tones of gentle
melancholy。 ``I love you�察�but fate has again caught me up。 I am being
whirled away。 I stretch out my arms to youin vain。 Do you
understand��'' It exasperated him for her to be so stillwhy didn't she
weep�拭�
She shook her head and replied quietly�此�
``Nowhat is it�拭 �Don't you love me any more��''
``Love has nothing to do with it��'' he said�察�as gently as he could in the
irritating circumstances。 ``My mysterious destiny has''
``You said that before��'' she interrupted。 ``What is it�拭 �Can't you tell
me so that I can understand��''
``You never loved me��'' he cried bitterly。
``You know that isn't so��'' she answered。 ``Won't you tell me�察�Carl��''
``A specter has risen from my pastI must leave youI may never
return''
She gave a low�察 �wailing cryit seemed like an echo of the music。
Then she began to sobnot loudly�察�but in a subdued�察�despairing way。 She
was not conscious of her grief�察 �but only of his wordsof the dream
vanished�察�the hopes shattered。
``Never��'' she said brokenly。
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``Never��'' he replied in a hoarse whisper。
Mr。 Feuerstein looked down at Hilda's quivering shoulders with
satisfaction。 ``I thought I could make even her feel��'' he said to himself
complacently。 Then to her in the hoarse undertone�此 �`And my heart is
breaking。''
She straightened and her tears seemed to dry with the flash of her eyes。
``Don't say thatyou mustn't��'' She blazed out before his astonished eyes�察�
a woman electric with disdain and anger。 ``It's false false� �I hate you´
´hate youyou never caredyou've made a fool of me''
``Hilda��'' He felt at home now and his voice became pleading and
anguished。 ``You�察�too�察�desert me� �Ah�察 �God�察 �whenever was there man
so wretched as I��'' He buried his face in his hands。
``Oh�察 �you put it on well��'' she scoffed。 ``But I know what it all
means。''
Mr。 Feuerstein rose wearily。 ``Farewell��'' he said in a broken voice。
``At least I am glad you will be spared the suffering that is blasting my life。
Thank God�察�she did not love me��''
The physical fact of his rising to go struck her courage full in the face。
``Nono��'' she urged hurriedly�察 �`not yet not just yetwait a few
minutes more''
``NoI must gofarewell��'' And he seated himself beside her�察�put his
arm around her。
She lay still in his arms for a moment�察�then murmured�此 �`Say it isn't
so�察�Carldear��''
``I would say there is hope�察�heart's darling��'' he whispered�察 �`but I have
no right to blast your young life。 And I may never return。''
She started up�察�her face glowing。
``Then you WILL return��''
``It may be that I can��'' he answered。 ``But''
``Then I'll waitgladly。 No matter how long it is�察 �I'll wait。 Why
didn't you say at first�察 �Hilda�察 �something I can't tell you about has
happened。 I must go away。 When I can�察�I'll come。' That would have
been enough�察�because II love you��''
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``What have I done to deserve such love as this��'' he exclaimed�察�and
for an instant he almost forgot himself in her beauty and sweetness and
sincerity。
``Will it be long��'' she asked after a while。
``I hope not�察�bride of my soul。 But I can notdare not say。''
``Wherever you go�察�and no matter what happens�察�dear��'' she said softly�察�
``you'll always know that I'm loving you�察�won't you��'' And she looked at
him with great�察�luminous�察�honest eyes。
He began to be uncomfortable。 Her complete trust was producing
an effect even upon his nature。 The good that evil can never kill out of a
man was rousing what was very like a sense of shame。 ``I must go now��''
he said with real gentleness in his voice and a look at her that had real
longing in it。 H