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head； her warm heart； her outreaching hands； will not permanently be
satisfied or self…respecting； though she have the prettiest dresses and hats
in town； or the most charming of dinners； dances； and teas。 Unless there
comes to her； and comes early； the one chief happiness of life；a marriage
of comradeship；she must face for herself the question； 〃What shall I do
with my life？〃
I recall a superb girl of twenty as I overtook her one winter morning
hurrying along Commonwealth Avenue。 She spoke of a brilliant party at a
friend's the previous evening。 〃But； oh！〃 she cried； throwing up her hands
in a kind of hopeless impatience； 〃tell me what to do。 My dancing days are
over！〃 I laughed at her； 〃Have you sprained your ankle？〃 But I saw I had
made a mistake when she added； 〃It is no laughing matter。 I have been out
three years。 I have not done what they expected of me；〃 with a flush and a
shrug； 〃and there is a crowd of nice girls coming on this winter； and
anyway； I am so tired of going to teas and ball…games and assemblies！ I
don't care the least in the world for foreign missions； and；〃 with a stamp；
〃I am not going slumming among the Italians。 I have too much respect for
the Italians。 And what shall I do with the rest of my life？〃 That was a frank
statement of what any girl of brains or conscience feels； with more or less
bitter distinctness； unless she marries early； or has some pressing work for
which she is well trained。
Yet even if that which is the profession of woman par excellence be
hers； how can she be perennially so interesting a companion to her
husband and children as if she had keen personal tastes； long her own； and
growing with her growth？ Indeed； in that respect the condition of men is
almost the same as that of women。 It would be quite the same were it not
for the fact that a man's business or profession is generally in itself a
means of growth； of education； of dignity。 He leans his life against it。 He
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builds his home in the shadow of it。 It binds his days together in a kind of
natural piety and makes him advance in strength and nobility as he 〃fulfils
the common round； the daily task。〃 And that is the reason why men in the
past； if they have been honorable men； have grown old better than women。
Men usually retain their ability longer； their mental alertness and
hospitality。 They add fine quality to fine quality； passing from strength to
strength and preserving in old age whatever has been best in youth。 It was
a sudden recognition of this fact which made a young friend of mine say
last winter； 〃I am not going to parties any more； the men best worth
talking with are too old to dance。〃
Even with the help of a permanent business or profession； however；
the most interesting men I know are those who have an avocation as well
as a vocation。 I mean a taste or work quite apart from the business of life。
This revives； inspires； and cultivates them perpetually。 It matters little
what it is； if only it is real and personal； is large enough to last； and
possesses the power of growth。 。A young sea…captain from a New England
village on a long and lonely voyage falls upon a copy of Shelley。 Appeal is
made to his fine but untrained mind； and the book of the boy poet becomes
the seaman's university。 The wide world of poetry and of the other fine arts
is opened； and the Shelleyian specialist becomes a cultivated； original； and
charming man。 A busy merchant loves flowers； and in all his free hours
studies them。 Each new spring adds knowledge to his knowledge； and his
friends continually bring him their strange discoveries。 With growing
wealth he cultivates rare and beautiful plants； and shares them with his
fortunate acquaintances。 Happy the companion invited to a walk or a drive
with such observant eyes； such vivid talk！ Because of this cheerful interest
in flowers； and this ingenious skill in dealing with them； the man himself
is interesting。 All his powers are alert； and his judgment is valued in public
life and in private business。 Or is it more exact to say that because he is
the kind of man who would insist upon having such interests outside his
daily work； he is still fresh and young and capable of growth at an age
when many other men are dull and old and certain that the time of decay is
at hand？
There are two reasons why women need to cultivate these large and
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abiding interests even more persistently than men。 In the first place； they
have more leisure。 They are indeed the only leisure class in the country；
the only large body of persons who are not called upon to win their daily
bread in direct wage…earning ways。 As yet； fortunately； few men among us
have so little self…respect as to idle about our streets and drawing…rooms
because their fathers are rich enough to support them。 We are not without
our unemployed poor； but roving tramps and idle clubmen are after all not
of large consequence。 Our serious； non…producing classes are chiefly
women。 It is the regular ambition of the chivalrous American to make all
the women who depend on him so comfortable that they need do nothing
for themselves。 Machinery has taken nearly all the former occupations of
women out of the home into the shop and factory。 Widespread wealth and
comfort； and the inherited theory that it is not well for the woman to earn
money so long as father or brothers can support her； have brought about a
condition of things in which there is social danger； unless with the larger
leisure are given high and enduring interests。 To health especially there is
great danger； for nothing breaks down a woman's health like idleness and
its resulting ennui。 More people； I am sure； are broken down nervously
because they are bored； than because they are overworked； and more still
go to pieces through fussiness； unwholesome living； worry over petty
details； and the daily disappointments which result from small and
superficial training。 And then； besides the danger to health； there is the
danger to character。 I need not dwell on the undermining influence which
men also feel when occupation is taken away and no absorbing private
interest fills the vacancy。 The vices of luxurious city life are perhaps
hardly more destructive to character than is the slow deterioration of
barren country life。 Though the conditions in the two cases are exactly
opposite； the trouble is often the same；absence of noble interests。 In the
city restless idleness organizes amusement； in the country deadly dulness
succeeds daily toil。
But there is a second reason why a girl should acquire for herself
strong and worthy interests。 The regular occupations of women in their
homes are generally disconnected and of little educational value； at least
as those homes are at present conducted。 Given the best will in the world；
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the daily doing of household details becomes a wearisome monotony if the
mere performance of them is all。 To make drudgery divine a woman must
have a brain to plan and eyes to see how to 〃sweep a room as to God's
laws。〃 Imagination and knowledge should be the hourly companions of
her who would make a fine art of each detail in kitchen and nursery。 Too
long has the pin been the appropriate symbol of the average woman's life
the pin； which only temporarily holds together things which may or may
not have any organic connection with one another。 While undoubtedly
most women must spend the larger part of life in this modest pin…work；
holding together the little things of home and school and society and
church； it is also true； that cohesive work itself cannot be done well； even
in humble circumstances； except by the refined； the trained； the growing
woman。 The smallest village； the plainest home； give ample space for the
resources of the trained college woman。 And the reason why such homes
and such villages are so often barr