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〃The man who built this house knew his business；〃 said Denis。 〃He
was an architect。〃
〃Was he？〃 said Henry Wimbush reflectively。 〃I doubt it。 The
builder of this house was Sir Ferdinando Lapith； who flourished during the
reign of Elizabeth。 He inherited the estate from his father； to whom it
had been granted at the time of the dissolution of the monasteries； for
Crome was originally a cloister of monks and this swimming…pool their
fish…pond。 Sir Ferdinando was not content merely to adapt the old
monastic buildings to his own purposes； but using them as a stone quarry
for his barns and byres and outhouses； he built for himself a grand new
house of brickthe house you see now。〃
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He waved his hand in the direction of the house and was silent。 severe；
imposing； almost menacing； Crome loomed down on them。
〃The great thing about Crome；〃 said Mr。 Scogan； seizing the
opportunity to speak； 〃is the fact that it's so unmistakably and aggressively
a work of art。 It makes no compromise with nature； but affronts it and
rebels against it。 It has no likeness to Shelley's tower； in the
'Epipsychidion；' which； if I remember rightly
〃'Seems not now a work of human art； But as it were titanic； in the
heart Of earth having assumed its form and grown Out of the mountain；
from the living stone； Lifting itself in caverns light and high。'
No； no； there isn't any nonsense of that sort about Crome。 That the
hovels of the peasantry should look as though they had grown out of the
earth； to which their inmates are attached； is right； no doubt； and suitable。
But the house of an intelligent； civilised； and sophisticated man should
never seem to have sprouted from the clods。 It should rather be an
expression of his grand unnatural remoteness from the cloddish life。
Since the days of William Morris that's a fact which we in England have
been unable to comprehend。 Civilised and sophisticated men have
solemnly played at being peasants。 Hence quaintness； arts and crafts；
cottage architecture； and all the rest of it。 In the suburbs of our cities you
may see； reduplicated in endless rows； studiedly quaint imitations and
adaptations of the village hovel。 Poverty； ignorance； and a limited range of
materials produced the hovel； which possesses undoubtedly； in suitable
surroundings； its own 'as it were titanic' charm。 We now employ our
wealth； our technical knowledge； our rich variety of materials for the
purpose of building millions of imitation hovels in totally unsuitable
surroundings。 Could imbecility go further？〃
Henry Wimbush took up the thread of his interrupted discourse。 〃All
that you say； my dear Scogan；〃 he began； 〃is certainly very just； very true。
But whether Sir Ferdinando shared your views about architecture or if；
indeed； he had any views about architecture at all； I very much doubt。 In
building this house； Sir Ferdinando was； as a matter of fact； preoccupied
by only one thoughtthe proper placing of his privies。 Sanitation was
the one great interest of his life。 In 1573 he even published； on this
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subject； a little booknow extremely scarcecalled； 'Certaine Priuy
Counsels' by 'One of Her Maiestie's Most Honourable Priuy Counsels； F。L。
Knight'； in which the whole matter is treated with great learning and
elegance。 His guiding principle in arranging the sanitation of a house
was to secure that the greatest possible distance should separate the privy
from the sewage arrangements。 Hence it followed inevitably that the
privies were to be placed at the top of the house； being connected by
vertical shafts with pits or channels in the ground。 It must not be thought
that Sir Ferdinando was moved only by material and merely sanitary
considerations； for the placing of his privies in an exalted position he had
also certain excellent spiritual reasons。 For； he argues in the third chapter
of his 'Priuy Counsels'； the necessities of nature are so base and brutish
that in obeying them we are apt to forget that we are the noblest creatures
of the universe。 To counteract these degrading effects he advised that the
privy should be in every house the room nearest to heaven； that it should
be well provided with windows commanding an extensive and noble
prospect； and that the walls of the chamber should be lined with
bookshelves containing all the ripest products of human wisdom； such as
the Proverbs of Solomon； Boethius's 'Consolations of Philosophy'； the
apophthegms of Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius； the 'Enchiridion' of
Erasmus； and all other works； ancient or modern； which testify to the
nobility of the human soul。 In Crome he was able to put his theories into
practice。 At the top of each of the three projecting towers he placed a
privy。 From these a shaft went down the whole height of the house； that
is to say； more than seventy feet； through the cellars； and into a series of
conduits provided with flowing water tunnelled in the ground on a level
with the base of the raised terrace。 These conduits emptied themselves
into the stream several hundred yards below the fish… pond。 The total
depth of the shafts from the top of the towers to their subterranean
conduits was a hundred and two feet。 The eighteenth century； with its
passion for modernisation； swept away these monuments of sanitary
ingenuity。 Were it not for tradition and the explicit account of them left
by Sir Ferdinando； we should be unaware that these noble privies had ever
existed。 We should even suppose that Sir Ferdinando built his house
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after this strange and splendid model for merely aesthetic reasons。〃
The contemplation of the glories of the past always evoked in Henry
Wimbush a certain enthusiasm。 Under the grey bowler his face worked
and glowed as he spoke。 The thought of these vanished privies moved
him profoundly。 He ceased to speak； the light gradually died out of his
face； and it became once more the replica of the grave； polite hat which
shaded it。 There was a long silence； the same gently melancholy
thoughts seemed to possess the mind of each of them。 Permanence；
transienceSir Ferdinando and his privies were gone； Crome still stood。
How brightly the sun shone and how inevitable was death！ The ways of
God were strange； the ways of man were stranger still。。。
〃It does one's heart good；〃 exclaimed Mr。 Scogan at last； 〃to hear of
these fantastic English aristocrats。 To have a theory about privies and to
build an immense and splendid house in order to put it into practiseit's
magnificent； beautiful！ I like to think of them all： the eccentric milords
rolling across Europe in ponderous carriages； bound on extraordinary
errands。 One is going to Venice to buy La Bianchi's larynx； he won't get
it till she's dead； of course； but no matter； he's prepared to wait； he has a
collection； pickled in glass bottles； of the throats of famous opera singers。
And the instruments of renowned virtuosi he goes in for them too； he
will try to bribe Paganini to part with his little Guarnerio； but he has small
hope of success。 Paganini won't sell his fiddle； but perhaps he might
sacrifice one of his guitars。 Others are bound on crusadesone to die
miserably among the savage Greeks； another； in