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Dinner done； behold the Friar； Philosewers； and myself the Dreary one；
walking； at six o'clock； across the fields； to the 〃Club… house。〃
As we swung open the last field…gate and entered the Allotment…
grounds； many members were already on their way to the Club； which
stands in the midst of the allotments。 Who could help thinking of the
wonderful contrast between these club…men and the club…men of St。
James's Street； or Pall Mall； in London！ Look at yonder prematurely old
man； doubled up with work； and leaning on a rude stick more crooked
than himself； slowly trudging to the club…house； in a shapeless hat like an
Italian harlequin's； or an old brown… paper bag； leathern leggings； and dull
green smock…frock； looking as though duck…weed had accumulated on it
the result of its stagnant lifeor as if it were a vegetable production；
originally meant to blow into something better； but stopped somehow。
Compare him with Old Cousin Feenix； ambling along St。 James's Street；
got up in the style of a couple of generations ago； and with a head of hair；
a complexion； and a set of teeth； profoundly impossible to be believed in
by the widest stretch of human credulity。 Can they both be men and
brothers？ Verily they are。 And although Cousin Feenix has lived so fast
that he will die at Baden…Baden； and although this club…man in the frock
has lived； ever since he came to man's estate； on nine shillings a week； and
is sure to die in the Union if he die in bed； yet he brought as much into the
world as Cousin Feenix； and will take as much outmore； for more of him
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is real。
A pretty； simple building； the club…house； with a rustic colonnade
outside； under which the members can sit on wet evenings； looking at the
patches of ground they cultivate for themselves； within； a well… ventilated
room； large and lofty； cheerful pavement of coloured tiles； a bar for
serving out the beer； good supply of forms and chairs； and a brave big
chimney…corner； where the fire burns cheerfully。 Adjoining this room；
another：
〃Built for a reading…room；〃 said Friar Bacon； 〃but not much used
yet。〃
The dreary sage； looking in through the window； perceiving a fixed
reading…desk within； and inquiring its use：
〃I have Service there；〃 said Friar Bacon。 〃They never went anywhere
to hear prayers； and of course it would be hopeless to help them to be
happier and better； if they had no religious feeling at all。〃
〃The whole place is very pretty。〃 Thus the sage。
〃I am glad you think so。 I built it for the holders of the Allotment…
grounds； and gave it them： only requiring them to manage it by a
committee of their own appointing； and never to get drunk there。 They
never have got drunk there。〃
〃Yet they have their beer freely？〃
〃O yes。 As much as they choose to buy。 The club gets its beer
direct from the brewer； by the barrel。 So they get it good； at once much
cheaper； and much better； than at the public…house。 The members take it
in turns to be steward； and serve out the beer： if a man should decline to
serve when his turn came； he would pay a fine of twopence。 The steward
lasts； as long as the barrel lasts。 When there is a new barrel； there is a new
steward。〃
〃What a noble fire is roaring up that chimney！〃
〃Yes； a capital fire。 Every member pays a halfpenny a week。〃
〃Every member must be the holder of an Allotment…garden？〃
〃Yes； for which he pays five shillings a year。 The Allotments you see
about us； occupy some sixteen or eighteen acres； and each garden is as
large as experience shows one man to be able to manage。 You see how
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admirably they are tilled； and how much they get off them。 They are
always working in them in their spare hours； and when a man wants a mug
of beer； instead of going off to the village and the public…house； he puts
down his spade or his hoe； comes to the club… house and gets it； and goes
back to his work。 When he has done work； he likes to have his beer at
the club； still； and to sit and look at his little crops as they thrive。〃
〃They seem to manage the club very well。〃
〃Perfectly well。 Here are their own rules。 They made them。 I
never interfere with them； except to advise them when they ask me。〃
RULES AND REGULATIONS MADE BY THE COMMITTEE
From the 21st September； 1857
One half…penny per week to be paid to the club by each member
1。Each member to draw the beer in order； according to the number of
his allotment； on failing； a forfeit of twopence to be paid to the club。
2。The member that draws the beer to pay for the same； and bring his
ticket up receipted when the subscriptions are paid； on failing to do so； a
penalty of sixpence to be forfeited and paid to the club。
3。The subscriptions and forfeits to be paid at the club…room on the
last Saturday night of each month。
4。The subscriptions and forfeits to be cleared up every quarter； if not；
a penalty of sixpence to be paid to the club。
5。The member that draws the beer to be at the club…room by six
o'clock every evening； and stay till ten； but in the event of no member
being there； he may leave at nine； on failing so to attend； a penalty of
sixpence to be paid to the club。
6。Any member giving beer to a stranger in this club…room； excepting
to his wife or family； shall be liable to the penalty of one shilling。
7。Any member lifting his hand to strike another in this club…room
shall be liable to the penalty of sixpence。
8。Any member swearing in this club…room shall be liable to a penalty
of twopence each time。
9。Any member selling beer shall be expelled from the club。
10。Any member wishing to give up his allotment； may apply to the
committee； and they shall value the crop and the condition of the ground。
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The amount of the valuation shall be paid by the succeeding tenant； who
shall be allowed to enter on any part of the allotment which is uncropped
at the time of notice of the leaving tenant。
11。Any member not keeping his allotment…garden clear from seed…
weeds； or otherwise injuring his neighbours； may be turned out of his
garden by the votes of two…thirds of the committee； one month's notice
being given to him。
12。Any member carelessly breaking a mug； is to pay the cost of
replacing the same。
I was soliciting the attention of Philosewers to some old old bonnets
hanging in the Allotment…gardens to frighten the birds； and the fashion of
which I should think would terrify a French bird to death at any distance；
when Philosewers solicited my attention to the scrapers at the club…house
door。 The amount of the soil of England which every member brought
there on his feet； was indeed surprising； and even I； who am professedly a
salad…eater； could have grown a salad for my dinner； in the earth on any
member's frock or hat。
〃Now；〃 said Friar Bacon； looking at his watch； 〃for the Pig…clubs！〃
The dreary Sage entreated explanation。
〃Why； a pig is so very valuable to a poor labouring man； and it is so
very difficult for him at this time of the year to get money enough to buy
one； that I lend him a pound for the purpose。 But； I do it in this way。 I
leave such of the club members as choose it and desire it； to form
themselves into parties of five。 To every man in each company of five； I
lend a pound； to buy a pig。 But； each man of the five becomes bound for
every other man； as to the repayment of his money。 Consequently； they
look after one a