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to talk to Ethelshe may better understand her。〃
〃I have never understood Flora；〃 said Meta。 〃She has been as kind to
me as possible； and I very soon came to a certain point with her； but
I never have known her thoroughly。 I doubt whether any one did but
dear Margaret。〃
Flora was； however； much softened and less reserved than she had
been。 She found great repose in her aunt's attendance； retracing； as
it did； her mother's presence； and she responded to her tenderness
with increasing reliance and comfort； while as her strength began to
revive； and there was more disposition to talk； she became gradually
drawn into greater confidence。
The seeing of Ethel was one of the difficult questions。 Flora had
begun to wish it very much； and yet the bare idea threw her into a
nervous tremor； that caused it to be put off again and again。 Her
aunt found her one day almost faint with agitationshe had heard
Ethel's voice in the next room； and had been winding up her
expectations； and now was as much grieved as relieved； to find that
she had been there seeing the baby； but was now gone。
〃How does the dear Ethel look？〃 asked Flora presently。
〃She is looking better to…day； she has looked very worn and harassed；
but I thought her brighter to…day。 She walked over by Aubrey on his
pony； and I think it did her good。〃
〃Dear old Ethel！ Aunt； it is a thing that no one has told me yet。
Can you tell me how she bore the news of Norman Ogilvie's
engagement？〃
〃Do you mean〃 and Mrs。 Arnott stopped short in her interrogation。
〃Yes；〃 said Flora； answering the pause。
〃But I thought young Ogilvie a most unexceptionable person。〃
〃So he is；〃 said Flora。 〃I was much annoyed at the time； but she was
resolute。〃
〃In rejecting him？〃
〃In running away as soon as she found what was likely to happen；〃 and
Flora； in a few words； told what had passed at Oxford。
〃Then it was entirely out of devotion to your father？〃
〃Entirely；〃 said Flora。 〃No one could look at her without seeing
that she liked him。 I had left her to be the only effective one at
home； and she sacrificed herself。〃
〃I am glad that I have seen her；〃 said Mrs。 Arnott。 〃I should never
have understood her by description。 I always said that I must come
home to set my correspondence going rightly。〃
〃Aunt Flora；〃 said her niece； 〃do you remember my dear mother's
unfinished letter to you？〃
〃To be sure I do； my dear。〃
〃Nothing ever was more true；〃 said Flora。 〃I read it over some
little time ago； when I set my papers in order； and understood it
then。 I never did before。 I used to think it very good for the
others。〃
〃It is what one generally does with good advice。〃
〃Do you recollect the comparison between Norman； Ethel； and me？ It
is so curious。 Norman； who was ambitious and loved praise； but now
dreads nothing so much； Ethel； who never cared for anything of the
kind； but went straight on her own brave way； and oh！ Aunt Florame…
…〃
〃Indeed； my dear； I should have thought you had her most full
approbation。〃
〃Ah！ don't you see the tone； as if she were not fully satisfied； as
if she only could not see surface faults in me；〃 said Flora； 〃and how
she said she dreaded my love of praise； and of being liked。 I wonder
how it would have been if she had lived。 I have looked back so often
in the past year； and I think the hollowness began from that time。
It might have been there before； but I am not so sure。 You see； at
that dreadful time； after the accident； I was the eldest who was able
to be efficient； and much more useful than poor Ethel。 I think the
credit I gained made me think myself perfection； and I never did
anything afterwards but seek my own honour。〃
Mrs。 Arnott began better to understand Flora's continued depression；
but she thought her self…reproach exaggerated； and said something at
once soothing and calculated to encourage her to undraw the curtain
of reserve。
〃You do not know；〃 continued Flora； 〃how greedy I was of credit and
affection。 It made me jealous of Ethel herself； as long as we were
in the same sphere； and when I felt that she was more to papa than I
could be； I looked beyond home for praise。 I don't think the things
I did were bad in themselvesbrought up as I have been； they could
hardly be so。 I knew what merits praise and blame too well for that…
…but oh！ the motive。 I do believe I cared very much for Cocksmoor。
I thought it would be a grand thing to bring about； but； you see； as
it has turned out； all I thought I had done for it was in vain； and
Ethel has been the real person and does not know it。 I used to think
Ethel so inferior to me。 I left her all my work at home。 If it had
not been for that； she might have been happy with Norman Ogilviefor
never were two people better matched； and now she has done what I
never thought to have left to anotherwatched over our own Margaret。
Oh！ how shall I ever bear to see her？〃
〃My dear； I am sure nothing can be more affectionate than Ethel。 She
does not think these things。〃
〃She does；〃 said Flora。 〃She always knew me better than I did
myself。 Her straightforward words should often have been rebukes to
me。 I shall see in every look and tone the opinion I have deserved。
I have shrunk from her steadfast looks ever since I myself learned
what I was。 I could not bear them nowand yetoh； aunt； you must
bring her！ Ethel！ my dear； dear old Kingmy darling's godmother
the last who was with Margaret！〃
She had fallen into one of those fits of weeping when it was
impossible to attempt anything but soothing her； but； though she was
so much exhausted that Mrs。 Arnott expected to be in great disgrace
with Dr。 May for having let her talk herself into this condition； she
found that he was satisfied to find that she had so far relieved her
mind； and declared that she would be better now。
The effect of the conversation was； that the next day； the last of
the twelve Christmas days； when Ethel； whose yearning after her
sister was almost equally divided between dread and eagerness
eagerness for her embrace； and dread of the chill of her reserve；
came once again in hopes of an interview。 Dr。 May called her at
once。 〃I shall take you in without any preparation；〃 he said； 〃that
she may not have time to be flurried。 Only； be quiet and natural。〃
Did he know what a mountain there was in her throat when he seemed to
think it so easy to be natural？
She found him leading her into a darkened room； and heard his
cheerful tones saying； 〃I have brought Ethel to you！〃
〃Ethel！ oh！〃 said a low； weak voice； with a sound as of expecting a
treat； and Ethel was within a curtain； where she began； in the
dimness； to see something white moving； and her hands were clasped by
two long thin ones。 〃There！〃 said Dr。 May； 〃now； if you will be
good； I will leave you alone。 Nurse is by to look after you； and you
know she always separates naughty children。〃
Either the recurrence to nursery language； or the mere sisterly touch
after long separation； seemed to annihilate all the imaginary mutual
dread； and； as Ethel bent lower and lower； and Flora's arms were
round her； the only feeling was of being together again； and both at
once made the childish gesture of affection； and murmured the old pet
names of 〃Flossy；〃 and 〃King；〃 that belonged to almost forgotten
days； when they were baby sisters； then kissed each other again。
〃I can't see you；〃 said Ethel； drawing herself up a little。 〃Why；
Flora； you look like a little white shadow！〃
〃I have had such weak eyes；〃 said Flora； 〃and this dim light is
comfortable。 I see your old sharp face quite plain。〃
〃But what can you do here？〃
〃Do？ Oh； dear Ethel； I have not had much of doing。 Papa says I have
three years' rest to make up。〃
〃Poor Flora！〃 said Ethel； 〃but I should have thought it tiresome；
especially for you。〃
〃I have only now been able to think again；〃 said Flora； 〃and you will
say I am taking to quoting poetry。 Do you remember some lines in
that drama that Norman admired so much？〃
〃Philip von Artevelde？〃
〃Yes。 I can't recollect them now； though they used to be always
running in my headsomething about time to mend and time to mourn。〃
〃These？〃 said Ethel
〃He that lacks time to mourn； lacks time to mend。
Eternity mourns that。〃
〃I never had time before for either；〃 said Flora。 〃You cannot think
how I used to be haunted by those； when I was chased from one thing
to another； all these long； long eighteen months。 I am in no haste
to take up work again。〃
〃Mending as well as mourning；〃 said Ethel thoughtfully。
Flora sighed。
〃And now you have that dear little Christmas gift to〃 Ethel paused。
〃She is not nearly so fine and healthy as her sister was；〃 said
Flora； 〃poor little dear。 You know； Ethel； even now； I shall have
very little time with her in that London life。 Her papa wants me so
much； and I must leave her toto the nurses。〃 Flora's voice
trembled again。
〃Our own dear old nurse；〃 said Ethel。
〃Oh！ I wanted to thank you all for sparing her to us；〃 said Flora。
〃George wished it so much。 But how does poor little Daisy bear it？〃
〃Very magnanimously；〃 said Ethel； s