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the new machiavelli-第30章

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We heard music; and went further along the arcade to discover a 

place where girls in operatic Swiss peasant costume were singing and 

dancing on a creaking; protesting little stage。  I eyed their 

generous display of pink neck and arm with the seasoned eye of a man 

who has lived in the world。  Life was perfectly simple and easy; I 

felt; if one took it the right way。



Next day Willersley wanted to go on; but I delayed。  Altogether I 

kept him back four days。  Then abruptly my mood changed; and we 

decided to start early the following morning。  I remember; though a 

little indistinctly; the feeling of my last talk with that woman 

whose surname; odd as it may seem; either I never learnt or I have 

forgotten。  (Her christian name was Milly。)  She was tired and 

rather low…spirited; and disposed to be sentimental; and for the 

first time in our intercourse I found myself liking her for the sake 

of her own personality。  There was something kindly and generous 

appearing behind the veil of naive and uncontrolled sensuality she 

had worn。  There was a curious quality of motherliness in her 

attitude to me that something in my nature answered and approved。  

She didn't pretend to keep it up that she had yielded to my 

initiative。  〃I've done you no harm;〃 she said a little doubtfully; 

an odd note for a man's victim!  And; 〃we've had a good time。  You 

have liked me; haven't you?〃



She interested me in her lonely dissatisfied life; she was childless 

and had no hope of children; and her husband was the only son of a 

rich meat salesman; very mean; a mighty smoker〃he reeks of it;〃 

she said; 〃always〃and interested in nothing but golf; billiards 

(which he played very badly); pigeon shooting; convivial Free 

Masonry and Stock Exchange punting。  Mostly they drifted about the 

Riviera。  Her mother had contrived her marriage when she was 

eighteen。  They were the first samples I ever encountered of the 

great multitude of functionless property owners which encumbers 

modern civilisationbut at the time I didn't think much of that 

aspect of them。 。 。 。



I tell all this business as it happened without comment; because I 

have no comment to make。  It was all strange to me; strange rather 

than wonderful; and; it may be; some dream of beauty died for ever 

in those furtive meetings; it happened to me; and I could scarcely 

have been more irresponsible in the matter or controlled events less 

if I had been suddenly pushed over a cliff into water。  I swam; of 

coursefinding myself in it。  Things tested me; and I reacted; as I 

have told。  The bloom of my innocence; if ever there had been such a 

thing; was gone。  And here is the remarkable thing about it; at the 

time and for some days I was over…weeningly proud; I have never been 

so proud before or since; I felt I had been promoted to virility; I 

was unable to conceal my exultation from Willersley。  It was a mood 

of shining shameless ungracious self…approval。  As he and I went 

along in the cool morning sunshine by the rice fields in the throat 

of the Val Maggia a silence fell between us。



〃You know?〃 I said abruptly;〃about that woman?〃



Willersley did not answer for a moment。  He looked at me over the 

corner of his spectacles。



〃Things went pretty far?〃 he asked。



〃Oh! all the way!〃 and I had a twinge of fatuous pride in my 

unpremeditated achievement。



〃She came to your room?〃



I nodded。



〃I heard her。  I heard her whispering。 。 。 。  The whispering and 

rustling and so on。  I was in my room yesterday。 。 。 。  Any one 

might have heard you。〃



I went on with my head in the air。



〃You might have been caught; and that would have meant endless 

trouble。  You might have incurred all sorts of consequences。  What 

did you know about her? 。 。 。  We have wasted four days in that hot 

close place。  When we found that League of Social Service we were 

talking about;〃 he said with a determined eye upon me; 〃chastity 

will be first among the virtues prescribed。〃



〃I shall form a rival league;〃 I said a little damped。  〃I'm hanged 

if I give up a single desire in me until I know why。〃



He lifted his chin and stared before him through his glasses at 

nothing。  〃There are some things;〃 he said; 〃that a man who means to 

workto do great public servicesMUST turn his back upon。  I'm not 

discussing the rights or wrongs of this sort of thing。  It happens 

to be the conditions we work under。  It will probably always be so。  

If you want to experiment in that way; if you want even to discuss 

it;out you go from political life。  You must know that's so。 。 。 。  

You're a strange man; Remington; with a kind of kink in you。  You've 

a sort of force。  You might happen to do immense things。 。 。 。  

Only〃



He stopped。  He had said all that he had forced himself to say。



〃I mean to take myself as I am;〃 I said。  〃I'm going to get 

experience for humanity out of all my talentsand bury nothing。〃



Willersley twisted his face to its humorous expression。  〃I doubt if 

sexual proclivities;〃 he said drily; come within the scope of the 

parable。〃



I let that go for a little while。  Then I broke out。  〃Sex!〃 said I; 

〃is a fundamental thing in life。  We went through all this at 

Trinity。  I'm going to look at it; experience it; think about it

and get it square with the rest of life。  Career and Politics must 

take their chances of that。  It's part of the general English 

slackness that they won't look this in the face。  Gods! what a 

muffled time we're coming out of!  Sex means breeding; and breeding 

is a necessary function in a nation。  The Romans broke up upon that。  

The Americans fade out amidst their successes。  Eugenics〃



〃THAT wasn't Eugenics;〃 said Willersley。



〃It was a woman;〃 I said after a little interval; feeling oddly that 

I had failed altogether to answer him; and yet had a strong dumb 

case against him。







BOOK THE SECOND



MARGARET







CHAPTER THE FIRST



MARGARET IN STAFFORDSHIRE





1



I must go back a little way with my story。  In the previous book I 

have described the kind of education that happens to a man of my 

class nowadays; and it has been convenient to leap a phase in my 

experience that I must now set out at length。  I want to tell in 

this second hook how I came to marry; and to do that I must give 

something of the atmosphere in which I first met my wife and some 

intimations of the forces that went to her making。  I met her in 

Staffordshire while I was staying with that uncle of whom I have 

already spoken; the uncle who sold my father's houses and settled my 

mother in Penge。  Margaret was twenty then and I was twenty…two。



It was just before the walking tour in Switzerland that opened up so 

much of the world to me。  I saw her once; for an afternoon; and 

circumstances so threw her up in relief that I formed a very vivid 

memory of her。  She was in the sharpest contrast with the industrial 

world about her; she impressed me as a dainty blue flower might do; 

come upon suddenly on a clinker heap。  She remained in my mind at 

once a perplexing interrogation and a symbol。 。 。 。



But first I must tell of my Staffordshire cousins and the world that 

served as a foil for her。







2





I first went to stay with my cousins when I was an awkward youth of 

sixteen; wearing deep mourning for my mother。  My uncle wanted to 

talk things over with me; he said; and if he could; to persuade me 

to go into business instead of going up to Cambridge。



I remember that visit on account of all sorts of novel things; but 

chiefly; I think; because it was the first time I encountered 

anything that deserves to be spoken of as wealth。  For the first 

time in my life I had to do with people who seemed to have endless 

supplies of money; unlimited good clothes; numerous servants; whose 

daily life was made up of things that I had hitherto considered to 

be treats or exceptional extravagances。  My cousins of eighteen and 

nineteen took cabs; for instance; with the utmost freedom; and 

travelled first…class in the local trains that run up and down the 

district of the Five Towns with an entire unconsciousness of the 

magnificence; as it seemed to me; of such a proceeding。



The family occupied a large villa in Newcastle; with big lawns 

before it and behind; a shrubbery with quite a lot of shrubs; a 

coach house and stable; and subordinate dwelling…places for the 

gardener and the coachman。  Every bedroom contained a gas heater and 

a canopied brass bedstead; and had a little bathroom attached 

equipped with the porcelain baths and fittings my uncle 

manufactured; bright and sanitary and stamped with his name; and the 

house was furnished throughout with chairs and tables in bright 

shining wood; soft and prevalently red Turkish carpets; cosy 

corners; curtained archways; gold…fram
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