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smile which plainly said； ‘If you desire to see the first and foremost
among female martyrs； here she is； on view！’
This little incident； illustrative though it was of Mrs Varden’s
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extraordinary sweetness and amiability； had so strong a tendency
to check the conversation and to disconcert all parties but that
excellent lady； that only a few monosyllables were uttered until
Edward withdrew； which he presently did； thanking the lady of
the house a great many times for her condescension； and
whispering in Dolly’s ear that he would call on the morrow； in case
there should happen to be an answer to the note—which； indeed；
she knew without his telling； as Barnaby and his friend Grip had
dropped in on the previous night to prepare her for the visit which
was then terminating。
Gabriel； who had attended Edward to the door； came back with
his hands in his pockets； and； after fidgeting about the room in a
very uneasy manner； and casting a great many sidelong looks at
Mrs Varden （who with the calmest countenance in the world was
five fathoms deep in the Protestant Manual）； inquired of Dolly how
she meant to go。 Dolly supposed by the stage…coach； and looked at
her lady mother； who finding herself silently appealed to； dived
down at least another fathom into the Manual； and became
unconscious of all earthly things。
‘Martha—’ said the locksmith。
‘I hear you； Varden；’ said his wife； without rising to the surface。
‘I am sorry； my dear； you have such an objection to the Maypole
and old John； for otherways as it’s a very fine morning； and
Saturday’s not a busy day with us； we might have all three gone to
Chigwell in the chaise； and had quite a happy day of it。’
Mrs Varden immediately closed the Manual； and bursting into
tears； requested to be led upstairs。
‘What is the matter now； Martha？’ inquired the locksmith。
To which Martha rejoined； ‘Oh！ don’t speak to me；’ and
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protested in agony that if anybody had told her so； she wouldn’t
have believed it。
‘But； Martha；’ said Gabriel； putting himself in the way as she
was moving off with the aid of Dolly’s shoulder； ‘wouldn’t have
believed what？ Tell me what’s wrong now。 Do tell me。 Upon my
soul I don’t know。 Do you know； child？ Damme！’ cried the
locksmith； plucking at his wig in a kind of frenzy； ‘nobody does
know； I verily believe； but Miggs！’
‘Miggs；’ said Mrs Varden faintly； and with symptoms of
approaching incoherence； ‘is attached to me； and that is sufficient
to draw down hatred upon her in this house。 She is a comfort to
me； whatever she may be to others。’
‘She’s no comfort to me；’ cried Gabriel； made bold by despair。
‘She’s the misery of my life。 She’s all the plagues of Egypt in one。’
‘She’s considered so； I have no doubt；’ said Mrs Varden。 ‘I was
prepared for that； it’s natural； it’s of a piece with the rest。 When
you taunt me as you do to my face； how can I wonder that you
taunt her behind her back！’ And here the incoherence coming on
very strong； Mrs Varden wept； and laughed； and sobbed； and
shivered； and hiccoughed； and choked； and said she knew it was
very foolish but she couldn’t help it； and that when she was dead
and gone； perhaps they would be sorry for it—which really under
the circumstances did not appear quite so probable as she seemed
to think—with a great deal more to the same effect。 In a word； she
passed with great decency through all the ceremonies incidental
to such occasions； and being supported upstairs； was deposited in
a highly spasmodic state on her own bed； where Miss Miggs
shortly afterwards flung herself upon the body。
The philosophy of all this was； that Mrs Varden wanted to go to
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Chigwell； that she did not want to make any concession or
explanation； that she would only go on being implored and
entreated so to do； and that she would accept no other terms。
Accordingly； after a vast amount of moaning and crying upstairs；
and much damping of foreheads； and vinegaring of temples； and
hartshorning of noses； and so forth； and after most pathetic
adjurations from Miggs； assisted by warm brandy…and…water not
over…weak； and divers other cordials； also of a stimulating quality；
administered at first in teaspoonfuls and afterwards in increasing
doses； and of which Miss Miggs herself partook as a preventive
measure （for fainting is infectious）； after all these remedies； and
many more too numerous to mention； but not to take； had been
applied； and many verbal consolations； moral； religious； and
miscellaneous； had been super…added thereto； the locksmith
humbled himself； and the end was gained。
‘If it’s only for the sake of peace and quietness； father；’ said
Dolly； urging him to go upstairs。
‘Oh； Doll； Doll；’ said her good…natured father。 ‘If you ever have a
husband of your own—’
Dolly glanced at the glass。
‘—Well； when you have；’ said the locksmith； ‘never faint； my
darling。 More domestic unhappiness has come of easy fainting；
Doll； than from all the greater passions put together。 Remember
that； my dear； if you would be really happy； which you never can
be； if your husband isn’t。 And a word in your ear； my precious。
Never have a Miggs about you！’
With this advice he kissed his blooming daughter on the cheek；
and slowly repaired to Mrs Varden’s room； where that lady； lying
all pale and languid on her couch； was refreshing herself with a
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sight of her last new bonnet； which Miggs； as a means of calming
her scattered spirits； displayed to the best advantage at her
bedside。
‘Here’s master； mim；’ said Miggs。 ‘Oh； what a happiness it is
when man and wife come round again！ Oh gracious； to think that
him and her should ever have a word together！’ In the energy of
these sentiments； which were uttered as an apostrophe to the
Heavens in general； Miss Miggs perched the bonnet on the top of
her own head； and folding her hands； turned on her tears。
‘I can’t help it；’ cried Miggs。 ‘I couldn’t； if I was to be drownded
in ’em。 She has such a forgiving spirit！ She’ll forget all that has
passed； and go along with you； sir—Oh； if it was to the world’s end；
she’d go along with you。’
Mrs Varden with a faint smile gently reproved her attendant for
this enthusiasm； and reminded her at the same time that she was
far too unwell to venture out that day。
‘Oh no； you’re not； mim； indeed you’re not；’ said Miggs； ‘I repeal
to master； master knows you’re not； mim。 The hair； and motion of
the shay； will do you good； mim； and you must not give way； you
must not raly。 She must keep up； mustn’t she； sir； for all out
sakes？ I was a telling her that； just now。 She must remember us；
even if she forgets herself。 Master will persuade you； mim； I’m
sure。 There’s Miss Dolly’s a…going you know； and master； and you；
and all so happy and so comfortable。 Oh！’ cried Miggs； turning on
the tears again； previous to quitting the room in great emotion； ‘I
never see such a blessed one as she is for the forgiveness of her
spirit； I never； n